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What is "love"?
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03-10-2012, 04:25 AM
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Cyzkrahu
Join Date
Oct 2005
Posts
477
Senior Member
But back to the question.
I constantly find myself wanting to sacrifice for her.
Buddha taught sacrifice (
caga
) is an esssential requirement for successful relationship. In two teachings about relationship, Buddha included sacrifice in both of them.
The compatible couple:
there are principles for partners in life to ensure their compatibility, providing a firm foundation for a long married life, called the four qualities for a good match (samajivi-dhamma):
Sama-saddha: having compatible faith; they uphold the same religion, revere the same objects of worship, concepts, beliefs or principles, and share the same lines of interest - they are equally firm in all these or can reach agreement on them.
Sama-sila: having compatible morality; they have conduct, morality, ethics, manners and upbringing which are harmonious or compatible.
Sama-caga: having compatible generosity; they are in accord, not conflict, with each other in their generosity, hospitality, munificence, sacrifice and readiness to help others.
Sama-panna: having compatible intelligence; they are sensible and can understand each other; they can at least reason with each other.
A Constitution for Living: Buddhist Principles for A Fruitful and Harmonious Life by Ven. PA Payutto
The couple sharing in goodness:
the four principles for leading the household life (gharavasa-dhamma) can be used by a couple in the following ways:
Sacca: truthfulness; being truthful and faithful to each other in thoughts, speech and deeds.
Dama: training; exercising restraint, training themselves to correct faults, resolve differences, adapt to each other and improve themselves.
Khanti: patience; being firm, stable and patient; not reacting impulsively to each other's affronts; enduring difficulties and hardships and overcoming obstacles together.
Caga: sacrifice; being thoughtful, able to give up personal comfort for the sake of one's partner by, for example, foregoing sleep in order to nurse him or her in sickness; also being kind and generous, not uncharitable, to the relatives and friends of one's partner.
A Constitution for Living: Buddhist Principles for A Fruitful and Harmonious Life by Ven. PA Payutto
Universally acknowledged as Thailand's foremost Buddhist scholar, Venerable P. A. Payutto's works range widely, from detailed exposition of the Suttas and Vinaya to consideration of the problems of society, environment, economy, law and science and technology -- all of these books and talks are based on an exceptionally profound and comprehensive grasp of the Buddha's Teaching.
The Works of Ven. P. A. Payutto
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