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**rikdpola** · 11-09-2011, 05:08 AM

Does Buddhist Thought allow for a person to deliberately increase the suffering of another person in the hope that it will teach a lesson that might otherwise never be learned?

hi Karma Yeshe

my impression is your post may not be clearly articulated in some aspects

however, for me, the example you provided about a family member with an addiction clarified your inquiry

i think your inquiry falls within the teaching of the Brahma Vihara, namely:

(1) metta: friendliness
(2) karuna: compassion (the wish to help others)
(3) mudita: appreciative joy
(4) upeka: equinimity

the Brahma Vihara instruct us to exercise compassion/helpfulness whenever we can

but, when we cannot help, then we exercise equinimity until the opportunity to help arises

so equinimity is not being uncaring or disinterested. the word 'upeka' has a linguistic root in the meaning 'to look'

equinimity is to be observant & composed until the opportunity arises to help

if the opportunity to help does not arise, then one must accept the other person is the creator, owner & heir of their actions

so, it seems the misconceptions arising from your post are due to the phrase: "allow for a person to deliberately increase the suffering of another person"

one person exercising equinimity does not "deliberately increase" the suffering of another person

imo, we are not 'God' or 'gods' that deliberately cause others to experience certain mental states

it is the other person that is increasing their own suffering

often, we can take upon ourselves the responsibilities of another where it is the responsibility of another to help themself

often, we can take upon ourselves the 'ownership' of the actions of others

so i agree, there are times, when our efforts to help others fail, we have no choice but to abandon our efforts, in the hope the other can come to a greater awareness of their own suffering & be more motivated to help themself

kind regards

element

[About developing the meditation on equanimity] the Buddha said that beings are the owners of their kamma (kammassakā), heirs of their kamma (kammadāyāda), have kamma as their origin (kammayonī), are related to their kamma (kammabandhū) and have kamma as their refuge (kammappatisaranā), whatever skilful or unskilful action (kamma) they do, they will inherit its results.

11-09-2011, 05:08 AM	#5
rikdpola Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 568 Senior Member	Does Buddhist Thought allow for a person to deliberately increase the suffering of another person in the hope that it will teach a lesson that might otherwise never be learned? hi Karma Yeshe my impression is your post may not be clearly articulated in some aspects however, for me, the example you provided about a family member with an addiction clarified your inquiry i think your inquiry falls within the teaching of the Brahma Vihara, namely: (1) metta: friendliness (2) karuna: compassion (the wish to help others) (3) mudita: appreciative joy (4) upeka: equinimity the Brahma Vihara instruct us to exercise compassion/helpfulness whenever we can but, when we cannot help, then we exercise equinimity until the opportunity to help arises so equinimity is not being uncaring or disinterested. the word 'upeka' has a linguistic root in the meaning 'to look' equinimity is to be observant & composed until the opportunity arises to help if the opportunity to help does not arise, then one must accept the other person is the creator, owner & heir of their actions so, it seems the misconceptions arising from your post are due to the phrase: "allow for a person to deliberately increase the suffering of another person" one person exercising equinimity does not "deliberately increase" the suffering of another person imo, we are not 'God' or 'gods' that deliberately cause others to experience certain mental states it is the other person that is increasing their own suffering often, we can take upon ourselves the responsibilities of another where it is the responsibility of another to help themself often, we can take upon ourselves the 'ownership' of the actions of others so i agree, there are times, when our efforts to help others fail, we have no choice but to abandon our efforts, in the hope the other can come to a greater awareness of their own suffering & be more motivated to help themself kind regards element [About developing the meditation on equanimity] the Buddha said that beings are the owners of their kamma (kammassakā), heirs of their kamma (kammadāyāda), have kamma as their origin (kammayonī), are related to their kamma (kammabandhū) and have kamma as their refuge (kammappatisaranā), whatever skilful or unskilful action (kamma) they do, they will inherit its results.
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