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**lagunaEl** · 11-09-2011, 02:24 PM

A teen aged boy picks a fight with a weaker student at school and is suspended. His parents, who are on the "A List" in their community, so to speak, intervenes with the Principal and the Boy is allowed to return to school and is faced with no punishment in any signifigent way. In a sense, this boys "suffering" in the short term was decreased by his parents but he is much more likely to become a bully or worse in his future.

There are many real life examples of this type of situation , just look at Paris Hilton Michiel Jackson or Linsey Lohan, one of whom has already suffered a painful death with Paris and Linsey not far behind. Jail time or a terrible withdrawal might just help but they are allowed to skate thru

Speaking in my role as a secondary school teacher who is a specialist in working with teenagers with emotional and behavioral difficulties, I'd like to say that focussing too much on 'punishment' isn't the sort of outcome we would expect in the UK. There are strategies in schools to help and mentor both bullies and the bullied. The bullies themselves need as much understanding and help as the people they bully. Sometimes its the case that they are being bullied themselves by relatives or siblings and/or that there are problems in their home life, or other negative experiences which they have had which urgently need to be addressed.

A quick example I can think of is that of 2 brothers who both became bullies, who had been regularly beaten brutally by their father and had a harrowing time at home. I always remember one of them saying to me "Why are you so kind to me?"

The idea of "Punishment" for children reminds me of caning in schools as well as past views in the colonial western world - which are of course irrelevant to this discussion, lol !

Also, people who are 'A list' don't necessarily have less personal dukkha than anyone else! Rather than isolation and a long suspension from school, a bully is better placed back with the school community within a counselling/mentoring system.

As for celebrities, I think it is a great mistake to become judgemental about them from what we see coming from often biased sensationalist media outlets of one kind or another which benefit financially on stories for the gullible public.

Jail is certainly not the answer in this country for young people or for celebrities, because people can leave jail not only resentful, but having been taught more criminal activities by other prisoners than those they went in with, and I've heard, being able to obtain drugs there from other prisoners too.

A terrible withdrawal might just help but they are allowed to skate thru"

... what's that supposed to mean ?Sounds like extremism to me!
Have you ever had experience of taking drugs or drinking alcohol yourself or seen anyone in heroin withdrawal for example ? When people are having extreme physical and mental drug withdrawals, its a case for concern, not for turning one's back. Sometimes people can die in those circumstances. In general, I don't think anyone just 'skates through' addiction, whatever their social position in life.

In any case, who are we to judge people we've never even met and just see on TV, a computer, newspaper or magazine.

Sometimes I overhear women gossiping about what they read in relation to celebrities, at newspaper and magazine sections in supermarkets. Its papanca !

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11-09-2011, 02:24 PM	#8
lagunaEl Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 439 Senior Member	A teen aged boy picks a fight with a weaker student at school and is suspended. His parents, who are on the "A List" in their community, so to speak, intervenes with the Principal and the Boy is allowed to return to school and is faced with no punishment in any signifigent way. In a sense, this boys "suffering" in the short term was decreased by his parents but he is much more likely to become a bully or worse in his future. There are many real life examples of this type of situation , just look at Paris Hilton Michiel Jackson or Linsey Lohan, one of whom has already suffered a painful death with Paris and Linsey not far behind. Jail time or a terrible withdrawal might just help but they are allowed to skate thru Speaking in my role as a secondary school teacher who is a specialist in working with teenagers with emotional and behavioral difficulties, I'd like to say that focussing too much on 'punishment' isn't the sort of outcome we would expect in the UK. There are strategies in schools to help and mentor both bullies and the bullied. The bullies themselves need as much understanding and help as the people they bully. Sometimes its the case that they are being bullied themselves by relatives or siblings and/or that there are problems in their home life, or other negative experiences which they have had which urgently need to be addressed. A quick example I can think of is that of 2 brothers who both became bullies, who had been regularly beaten brutally by their father and had a harrowing time at home. I always remember one of them saying to me "Why are you so kind to me?" The idea of "Punishment" for children reminds me of caning in schools as well as past views in the colonial western world - which are of course irrelevant to this discussion, lol ! Also, people who are 'A list' don't necessarily have less personal dukkha than anyone else! Rather than isolation and a long suspension from school, a bully is better placed back with the school community within a counselling/mentoring system. As for celebrities, I think it is a great mistake to become judgemental about them from what we see coming from often biased sensationalist media outlets of one kind or another which benefit financially on stories for the gullible public. Jail is certainly not the answer in this country for young people or for celebrities, because people can leave jail not only resentful, but having been taught more criminal activities by other prisoners than those they went in with, and I've heard, being able to obtain drugs there from other prisoners too. A terrible withdrawal might just help but they are allowed to skate thru" ... what's that supposed to mean ?Sounds like extremism to me! Have you ever had experience of taking drugs or drinking alcohol yourself or seen anyone in heroin withdrawal for example ? When people are having extreme physical and mental drug withdrawals, its a case for concern, not for turning one's back. Sometimes people can die in those circumstances. In general, I don't think anyone just 'skates through' addiction, whatever their social position in life. In any case, who are we to judge people we've never even met and just see on TV, a computer, newspaper or magazine. Sometimes I overhear women gossiping about what they read in relation to celebrities, at newspaper and magazine sections in supermarkets. Its papanca ! .
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