[usadatronourl]

Ive debated this over and over in my mind, a couple years I go I took my plan into action, without the consent of the local temple were I used to be a monk, I become a non celibate lama, with long hair and jewelery and continued dating my girlfriend, in my avatar picture you can see what I looked like then, well ive got religion again and am restarting my attempt to set an example of a non celibate clergy but this time the difference with real monks is more obvious.

I simply wear monk coloured clothes, shirt, t shirt and pants, right now Im wearing maroon pants, orange t shirt and dark red shirt, a crucifix necklace, three gold and silver rings, and a new watch, i smoke cigarettes, another thing forbidden to lamas and I occassionly play music and or sing, and I have long hair, so im really only keeping 6 of the ten precepts, I strictly observe the 5 precepts and have a close celibate relationship with a woman.

Once you've been a monk in the Thai or southeast asian tradition like I have, I think your called a Bhikku, and you are really supposed to stay a teacher and source of wisdom for young people the rest of your life, I just aim to make that more visible that I am, in reality in some small way I am a guru, not a lama or a monk, but I have taken a lifetime vow in the Mahayana tradition to do this the rest of my life, and sincerely believe my Karma is in jepardy if I go back to my old ways,

I have fought drugs all my life and have only been off them three years, these monk coloured clothes remind me how mortally important it is to keep those 6 precepts and most of the other couple hundred the monks observe. Its working for me, how does it sound to you, i'm really interested to hear.