[DoroKickcrofe]

So... still having trouble with this one today. Wondering if ya might have some advice for me.

Girl I was hanging out with (kinda think there was a little more going on there) and hopefully heading toward dating had just been dumped by her fiance. Yes, bad idea to get into a rebound relationship, I know. But, I had been completely infatuated with this girl since the first time I laid eyes on her. In the early stages of the relationship, she was still tryin to work things out with her ex fiance if possible. Don't get me wrong, I was hoping it wouldn't work out, but at the same time, I wasn't gonna get in the way if it did. Longer story short, she got pregnant while still trying to work things out with her ex fiance. Didn't take long before her ex fiance wanted less and less to do with her. I became more the central figure as she didn't hang out with any of her ex fiance's friends during this time either. So, one day she told me that I'd probably be helping her raise this baby. Now, as much as I cared about her, I honestly fell head over heals in love with that kid even though he hadn't been born yet. Unfortunately, extreme stress and other bodily factors I won't go into (for her privacy's sake), she miscarried. When she did miscarry, she found out it was a little boy. While I wasn't the biological father of this little boy, I had pretty much already adopted him in my mind. To this day, it feels like I lost a son to a miscarriage. And to this day it still hurts. That happened 10+ years ago.

Started going out with another girl a few years back. She had just gotten out of a relationship as well. I can't remember if she had been dumped or the guy had dumped her. Either way, she had gotten pregnant before we even started dating, and she honestly didn't know it until we'd be dating for a few weeks. Bad decision or not, I decided to stick with her. I liked the girl, and as above, I started to like the kid. Unfortunately, the biological father wanted absolutely NOTHING to do with her or her baby, and she didn't even want to take him to court for child support or anything. Since he wanted nothing to do with her, she wanted nothing to do with him. Well, the thought of being a single mother caused her stress to go through the roof and her blood pressure skyrocketed. Long story short, blood pressure was too high for the embryo to be able to attach to her, and she ended up miscarrying as well.

Now, neither of these children were my flesh and blood. And, I'll admit, I had invested a lot more emotion into the first than the second (mainly because the amount of time... first one took a while, second one was incredibly fast), I've essentially lost two kids to miscarriages.

Miscarriages hurt emotionally... badly... for a LONG LONG time.

Any advice?

SG

Edit: Oh and just to make sure everything is clear, the above actually did happen. I'm not making up any of it (not even the slightest detail).