[skupaemauto]

I'm going to try to describe a couple different things that have been happening to me, and I'm wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences, or if someone can give me some insight as to what this is...

First there's a conscious focusing of energy I can do. As I sit there, if I focus through my torso area, I can feel this energy coursing up through my body. It feels a bit like fire, or an adrenaline rush. I think it might be chi, or prana, but I'm not sure. It's a very physical sensation. It's almost like fire, or a rush of wind.

I can only sustain it for about 2 seconds and then I have to rest for a few seconds. It's almost like tensing muscles, but it's accompanied by a rush that goes all the way from my pelvic region to the top of my head. I imagine someone who's very sensitive at detecting energy would probably have to be near me to get a good idea of what this energy is. I'm wondering if it's useful - what can I do with it? Should I try to summon it in a more focused and sustained manner? I just learned I could do this sometime within the past year, but I do remember as a very small child I could make myself so heavy that big kids couldn't pick me up. It seems like it might be related, but I'm not sure.

Another type of energy that I've been experiencing is spontaneous. It happens when I'm half awake and half asleep. If I wake up in the night I can feel it coursing through me, and usually what follows will be an extremely vivid, often lucid dream, or what feels like astral projection or even time travel. I've had some extremely powerful experiences following this energy release.

It feels much more powerful than what I was talking about earlier when I consciously summon energy, but it's similar. One difference is that this comes in waves, or a vibration, almost like someone is blasting a subwoofer through me. Sometimes I can hear it in my ears like wind. Sometimes it's smooth, and sometimes it's rough. I can consciously direct the flow somewhat, and if I wake up to full consciousness, it goes away. It's definitely connected to being half awake/half asleep. It feels tingly and in some ways, it almost feels like some type of drug. The sensation covers my whole body, but it's especially strong from the waist up.

It doesn't feel negative at all - it's actually rather pleasant, but in some ways it almost feels scary... like I've awoken some kind of dragon inside me... like there's a side of me that's extremely ancient and powerful.

What is this? Are they both the same energy? Is this Kundalini? I don't practice Kundalini Yoga, but I do a lot of chakra meditations and breathwork. When this energy happens though, it's never part of meditation. The first type of energy is like flexing muscles somewhere, and the second just happens spontaneously in the wee hours of the night, about 3-4 times a week. Actually I should start logging how often it happens in my journal.