[Gometesstem]

Quote[/b] (Mateo @ Oct. 19 2004,12:14)]Man, I don't even know how to respond to your post. To me, that was kind of heartless. It is like you are telling her to suck it up.

Actually that is exactly what should be done, while both before and after the trip she discuss her feeling about the matter with the boyfriend. But during the trip absolutely you got restrain yourself. Besides you will not be showing affection as you are accustomed to anyway in Thailand. Consider his feelings, quite possibly he does not wish to be humiliated by having a g/f who wishes to display affection in a manner not appropriate in Thailand. So this is the easiest way he can explain to you how important it is that his country's cultural guidelines are followed, while there at least. I suggest some reading on the culture. Not that you do not understand it, but read some considering his standpoint relating to the choice he made.

Quote[/b] (Mateo @ Oct. 19 2004,12:14)]
Blonde18, you should express how you feel about this to his parents.

DO NOT DO THAT, not in a Thai household that is a horrific way to show great disrespect to your boyfriend and rub it into his family's face.

Quote[/b] (Mateo @ Oct. 19 2004,12:14)]
It is awesome that you have been together for 2 years; you guys should express your love. You shouldn't be forced to hide it.

I agree, but do it the manner he is requesting, as was mentioned he is probably having a difficult time explaining to you the concept of dating the Thai way. In the West dating is considered entertainment, something to do on a Saturday night. In Thailand it is used for the purposes of finding a marriage mate for the most part. So if you were to be introduced as a girlfriend, it may open a door to issues at this point in his mind. Not so much issues with you, but probably in regards to his relationship with his parents, age, current social status, etc...

Now Blonde18, all those things considered.....you may give him winks, flirtacious smiles all while in the prescence of his family. His mother will likely be much more impressed by these actions, you may easily win the confidence of his parents before they even know how much he feels for you. Especially for the fact that you are displaying respect for their culture by keeping it very low profile. Do you really think they won't know as soon as they see a beautiful young girl with their son, what is going on? They are still people. Consider it like the morals people were expected to to display as if dating in the USA 70 years ago, and it will be easier. Maybe the flirting on the trip will break him down.... have fun with it!

Mateo I am not being negative to your post, your post completely applies if her bf had American parents in Chicago, completely. That simply is not the case though and courting is something considered quite sacred over there. Here it is not.

Possibly you don't realize what an outcast they would be considered if they were to show affection, but in either case I am 99% sure that is why he is insistant on her understanding her place while abroad. Mateo welcome to the forums! Don't worry the Mango is a cool guy His wife is Thai also, so there is a bit more insight on the subject of dating while there. He was being helpful and telling her to have a good time