[Vomazoono]

"The Depressing Year"

For about a year I was unemployed, living with my brorther, in a state of depression. It is great to have family around, because in time of need, you really see what family means.

This was probably the toughest year of my life. The issue that was created from that job experience was a big one. I continued having issues sleeping. I felt like not doing anything. I couldn't understand how I couldn't sleep anymore. I felt very down all the time. I was not hanging out with friends and I didn't want to hang out with friends. When I didn't get sleep, I didn't have any of that great confidence I usually have. I felt disoriented, lost, I lacked confidence. It was a long year of not doing anything.

Then throughout that year there were attempts at jobs but I couldn't hold any of those jobs anymore. I was just too tired. I would even sleep some nights, but the stress, my state of depression, totally drained me out. Basically I had just started to feel as though nobody could rely on me. I was depressed and with every new employer I felt as though they were counting on me and I couldn't be reliable (like I always had been in the past) In the interviews I knew I would be lying about being reliable because the last year or so I was anything but. I relied on my brother to get me through that time.

I just remember feeling as though there was nothing that can happen to change all that was happening.