[Soypopetype]

i can totally understand your situations firewalker and larissa.

the best advice i can give you is to practice forgiveness. it's hard to love someone when you have been hurt by them or feel anger towards them. i know this from my own personal experience. negative energy is very draining, i felt my self wilting from the inside-out because i was surrounded by so much pain, anger, and fear. if you do not face it then it begins to manifest in dreams, thoughts, a sense of feeling at loss in what to do, depression.
my older brother started doing drugs, my parents tried to get him to stop but he was out of control. he became very selfish and self centered.
my family is also very close, during the holidays my relatives would all come over for dinner, and we would all reconnect as a family. but since the drug use started my parents stopped inviting my relatives over (i know that they where embarrassed), my parents stopped going to social events and they looked so sad. so their own personal relationship fell apart.
i started to hate my brother, i asked my parents to just let him go, he caused to much pain he deserved to suffer. of course they didn't. so my relationship with my parents suffered.
it took me a whole year to have the strength and understanding to deal with my inner self, of letting my self down, of letting others who loved me down. i finally felt enough compassion for my self to finally forgive me. i had suffered long enough too.
then i started to forgive my parents. and after much reflection i forgave my brother. i haven't spoken to him, but in my heart i have forgiven and now feel much love and compassion for him and his own life struggles.

a life lesson i have thank god for. time away is good to reflect and gain understanding, but once you do come to both you have to go back and use it.
and remember your higher-self doesn't put you in a situation that i feels you cant learn from.
i look at every thing as a learning experience, when good things happen i have learned to appreciate them and feel much gratitude. when confronted with negative, if it is a person i approach them with forgiveness, love and compassion. it's very hard to do, i still walk away annoyed or irritated some times, but it is a learning process and every opportunity is a chance for growth. when the person does say something positive re-enforce it, i usually say "why thank you, i appreciate that very much" and then in return i do or say something positive to them.
this is what i have learned from my own experience, i hope each one of you finds the love and light in your own situations and remember that you are not alone.