[autolubitelone]

you speak from my heart. i had times when all this spiritual knowledge, at that point i didnt even know of 2012 yet, and living these teachings in daily life filled me with great joy. i was always very centered, very happy, my vibration was so high and i felt like one of the happiest person on earth.
when i found out about 2012 and realized that this is all real, i was even happier because now i knew that all made sense. my whole existence made sense for the first time in my life, i knew why i didnt fit in so well like other people and always had struggle with the normal society.

but these days, since some weeks or so, all this knowledge that everything will be fine in the end, doesnt help me to stay centered. these days, my thoughts are rumbling again, i cant finish a book that i read, im very tired and also have some physical pains. and i have no clue why that is so, the only explanation i have since im quiet empathic, like all guys in here, that we feel how the old world is going down. its hard to describe but somehow i cannot become as centered as i was like for example 6 months ago, sometimes it works for some hours and i feel this joy again, but it doesnt hold any longer at the moment. i also have problems with meditation, like 2 months ago after having meditated for about 10 or 15 mins, i reached a state of pure balance and my mind was totally clear and everything was so vivid. now im not even able to get to that point, sometimes i fall asleep or just cant concentrate enough to clear my mind.

and somehow i feel that this is not my fault, because in general i should be happy, we all should be because we know the order of the chaos the world is in at the moment. i know its easy to blame it on other things than themself, but somehow i believe that its a dark time in the world at the moment and we feel the effects of it because of your empathy.

i tried to explain to my mum, why im so tired and kinda exhausted at the moment and came up with an interesting concept.
because we are slowly disconnecting from this world, i mean in a sense the false world that is full of lies and injustice and the new world still needs to be manifested, we are in a state of being inbetween.
i believe because of the knowledge what is really going on and the natural disconnection that follows, we are having less energy available than others who still feel totally connected to the old and materialistic world.
i think this also has to do with the fact that we are in the fifth night of the maya calender at the moment, once we reach the sixth day we will be more creative and will have more energy again. new ideas and inventions will blossom.

normally i just wanted to write like two sentences, but somehow it came out of me^^

i wish you a very nice day and night! :-)

love & light, frederik.