[theatadug]

hi all!

i have mentioned before in former posts that my oldest son is diagnosed add. most believe that add and adhd are the more mild forms of asperger's syndrome and autistic is the more severe form of it. i want to post a video to share with you all about bill gates. in the video he is doing what is called 'stimming'. stimming is a repetitive behavior that one does in order to calm or comfort themselves. my boys showed signs of stimming at very young ages. one form of stimming is 'rocking'. my youngest son is a rocker and began doing this at about 9 months old. he is now 2 1/2. although he doesnt rock like he used to, he will still do this if he is very tired or if he has to sit still too long with nothing to do (such as in the car). we would always try to interests his attention in a different direction to do something when he wanted to rock, but there was no stopping him.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qnve...eature=related

my oldest son was diagnosed at a young age but i fought the system for 4 yrs. by not putting him on medicine. he is bright, social, happy, creative....but he has trouble focusing on one thought at a time. when he entered 5th grade, the need for him to be able to focus on one thing got the best of him. within the first month of school, he was failing. you must understand, i wore myself out thinking i myself could help him. we would spend hours on homework every night. i was convinced that if i did all that i could do, he would be ok in school. but he forgot homework everyday. he would forget where the homework was that he did. even though we would go over things every night and even in the mornings, he would loose focus and give you the answer "i dont know". i spent yrs. of many nights working with him, studying with him, leading him, thinking after a while, what i was doing would imprint his mind somehow and he would learn to be structured and focused. when i realized that what i was doing was not enough, i felt i failed him. after 2 weeks of trying a low dose medication....he was bringing home straight a's. i cant tell you all the torchers my mind and spirit went through over this decision. but, my son isnt overwhelmed anymore, he isnt forgetting things, in fact, his sister takes longer at homework (this was never ever the case before).

i cant say i am 100% anything is the right thing. but, i have learned alot about how different children learn in different ways. some can learn alot of things at one time but have trouble learning one thing at a time.

when my youngest son began rocking, i searched everything i could get my hands on. in some cases, it is no worse then getting comfort from sucking a thumb. about age 1, my youngest began showing a new comfort....he liked to draw. when he would start rocking, i would give him paper and markers and he would scribble. he would get so upset if he found a marker and couldnt scribble. its not that he wouldnt except disciple. you could tell him no about going outside or no you cant touch that...but with the drawing, it was different. i ended up handing over the walls of my house to allow him his comfort in scribbling. you all can think im crazy if you want, but its not like i cant paint the walls. i dont fret over it really, i feel im allowing him to do something that seems very natural to him. you all would freak if you saw my walls. he is slow to talk, but this is how we have got him to come around. he has his abcs on the wall, as well as names, numbers, simple pictures of things...and he finally began talking. now at 2 1/2, he is excepting the fact that he has to stop drawing on the walls. i have a whole table just for him that always has books and a box full of drawing utensils. he is 2 1/2, slow to talk, but he recognizes all of his letters, numbers and can draw a face, sun, boat and can even write his name. will he learn different then other children? i am pretty sure he will. it might be a challenge, but there are goods that come out of things.

both of my boys are over empathetic. my oldest is very sensitive to his own consciousness and to others. he feels others pain and cant help but to show he feels bad for them. my youngest seems to think we are all just telepathic and can read his mind when he wants something. i think this is another reason he is slow to talk.

i found out one day that albert eisenstein didnt talk till he was about 4 yrs. old. i also found out one day that stephen spielberg's mom used to let the children write and draw on her walls. and then, you have bill gates as i pointed out that seems to 'rock' when he needs to calm himself.

things are moving forward...i am getting ready to paint my walls before winter comes. i have taken pictures of my walls, for there is 2 yrs. of memories there of my son 'calming' himself by drawing. i am aware that him drawing on the walls shows something about me and my reactions to how i handled him. his drawing on the walls was my way of coping with a child i didnt understand.

my children have never had any social problems, they are all big lovers, and are very creative. i choose to only give my oldest the medicine on school days, not on the weekends and i took him off of it through the summer. i hope he can learn how to wire his mind so to say, to where one day, he can learn how to work through school and stay focused.

also, they are very picky eaters. my youngest son has still never ate meat. he lives on fruit, vegs. and bread. he wont touch meat.

i do not believe anymore that there is nothing to add, adhd, ect....i denied it for a long time, for i didnt want to label my child. i am proud of my creative children. my girl seems totally unaffected in anyways with these troubles, but it is full in my boys. when my oldest son is around someone sad and troubled, he becomes sad and troubled. but on the other end, when he is around children and playing, he becomes the leader of the group. he will spend hours drawing pictures of designs with geometry. he hangs the pictures in his room, his walls are covered with these awesome pictures. i was looking at some the other day....he has this picture of a giant ying yang plowing through the sky, at the bottom is a town and people leaving the town with their cars loaded up with their belongings. go figure. he also draws pictures of spaceships and aliens and weird lavatories and gadgets that look like they are sending some sort of unwanted electrical shocks into people hooked up to some electrical device.

very eccentric children.

peace to all,
lynette