[CowextetleSix]

sorry for taking so long to respond. i am in japan and so more than likely on the opposite day/night schedule from most people in this forum.

beautifully said. now what i am wondering is why you are doubting your thoughts, they are so beatiful.

thank you for that. well, i guess the reason i am having a few doubts about this line of thinking is perhaps because its so different from the thinking of everyone else in the world around me. most people that i interact with cannot handle being around someone like me. to them, i seem rather cold hearted and uncaring simply because i follow my desire, intuition, and free will and dont do what they want me to do. i am currently in a relationship. me and my mate had a discussion recently in which this topic was brought up. in the end, i ended up telling her that i could look upon another with the same level of love and acceptance as i do her. i could even do sexual things with another without decreasing the love that i have for her in any way. when she asked me why i dont then, my response was because that is what i choose not to do. it all boils down to free will. when she heard that it was only my free will- not some magic spell, or divine feeling that i could only get from her or some particulary trait that only she possessed-was the reason that i chose to be with her, she seemed to be deeply confused and became a bit on the sad side, abruptly ending the conversation as well.

i guess my point is, i dont want to be a trigger of suffering for others. i know that we all create our own suffering and that the point of suffering is to attain self-mastery, but still i cant help but not want to be a part of that. whenever i apply these guidelines to relationships with people who have not even remotely considered such things, i am "the devil", or so i'm told.

maybe you can pass on the rest of your thoughts, im interested in knowing what they are.

sure. there aren't very many, and a few of them are a bit redundant. the reason for that being that these come from seeing what works and what doesnt in actual life situations, not just in my imagination. sometimes you need a different angle to the same thing to see it clearly.

・stay in the present moment, as much as possible
・never act from (because of) the imagined feelings of another. (ex: because he will be angry with me…, or she will be hurt….etc.)
・you are not responsible for the feelings or thoughts of another. you cannot make them feel anything. you cannot hurt them. you can however influence/invite them to feel a certain way and influence/invite them to feel hurt through your actions and words.
・no one outside of me is responsible for my feelings or thoughts.
・do not help others unless they ask for it first. even then, help in the way that you see fit for the situation, which may or may not be what they are requesting of you.
・always think/act from a position of love　rather than fear or pure reason.
・remember: your truth is not their truth

i am always looking for ways to evolve and adjust, so let me know what you think.

be well,
kensanwa