[avaiftBoara]

thanks for the warm feedback! that's just about what i needed to hear/read. art and butterfriends, your words really resonates within me and it was pretty much what i thought also...thanks a bunch, it really helped!

nevertheless i'd like to give some reactions that might give the reader an idea as to why i have such a hard time with it lately. i'm affraid it's all a bit more complicated.

butterfriends wrote: do you do any meditation or have quiet time when you can connect with yourself? one of the things i try and do is to simply be aware of the divinity of all things in my day to day life, no matter how mundane, perhaps your experiences are pointing you in that direction? so reminding you to see the divinity in your hammer and the work you do for example. yes, i do meditate, on the sinc's themselves also...........the word that hits me most in this quote is "work". within 3 months i have both a new job (that's work) and i am slowly starting to share my 'transformed' inner self with others.(that's work too).
so, yeah i guess you're right about this one now i read it.

bf: not sure i can help you on the questions re negative greetings but my gut feelings on your synchronicities are that they could confirmations and reminders to tune into yourself. well you can be sure allright you did help me with my question. thanks.

art said: i can relate. there is definitely something amiss going on, and i'm not sure how to define it, or even how to handle it . or, should i even worry about it? hows that for confusion! ummmm, yeah, sure i can realate but that's exactly what it is, confusion. and it's not that i want and have to know what every individual sinc means, but there are sooo many

i often go back to the mindset of "let it be" or "just be". know what you mean. same here and still i don't get it (for now).

also came to the conclusion that i was spending too much time looking outside myself, not within, and was becoming too dependent on this website and forum. while it was certainly nice to contribute, i was missing out on the best parts of life. so, i took a complete break for about 3 weeks, and am only now coming back here to check things out. i don't know if i will ever post like i did, or even read all the material like i used to. i kinda feel like unplugging all together to be honest. . thanks for sharing and taking the time to react.awesome, thanks. i'm getting way out of line too here, but that's all good.

all is well, there is nothing to fear. so, i'm not so wrapped up in "saving the world" anymore. but, that doesn't mean we can be complacent, or even worse, indifferent, either... we're here right now for a purpose. to experience, to learn, to love. but don't be afraid to make mistakes and don't live up to someone else's standards. do what you can while enjoying life and experiencing all that you desire. i'm not into saving everything either but my own enthousiasm about the whole change-thing somehow radiates off off me and people notice that. i'm totally fine with that, no bothers and whatever little it is i "know" i'll share if honestly wanted.

it's not that i'm 'really out there' as a result of what's happening, still basically the same old me only more aware of things, more sensitive, positive.
[quote]hope this helped, or brought you comfort. if not, thats ok too - someone else can answer. may not even be posted, as i feel this was pretty scattered...

take care jan, and all of you here on the dc forum. i don't know if i'll be coming back or not, but i wanted to at least say bye if not... thanks again, it did help.
take care too!

light and love
all of you