[CelexaNY]

Here are a few things for you all to know which is most appropriate to this forum:

>WOMEN\'S ENGLISH


>1. Yes = No
>2. No = Yes
>3. Maybe = No
>4. We need... = I want.
>5. I am sorry = you\'ll be sorry
>6. We need to talk = I need to complain
>7. Sure, go ahead = I don\'t want you to
>8. Do what you want = You\'ll pay for this later
>9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!
>10. Are you listening to me?? = Too late, you\'re dead
>11. You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
>12. Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs
>13. You\'re so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
>14. Do you love me? = I am going to ask for something expensive
>15. It\'s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now
>16. You\'re certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?
>17. I\'ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV
>18. How much do you love me? = I did something today that you\'re really not going to like
>
>
>MEN\'S ENGLISH

>I am hungry = I am hungry
>2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
>3. I am tired = I am tired
>4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
>5. I love you = Let\'s have sex now
>6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
>7. What\'s wrong? = I guess sex is out of the question?
>8. May I have this dance? = I\'d like to have sex with you
>9. Can I call you sometime? = I\'d like to have sex with you
>10. Do you want to go to a movie? = I\'d like to have sex with you
>11. Can I take you out to dinner? = I\'d like to have sex with you
>12. Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for other men to have sex with you
>13. You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to have sex with you within the next 3 mins.
>14. Let\'s talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person, and then I\'d like to
>have sex with you.

The rockstone