[BaselBimbooooo]

LIKES

I will cut you if you talk smack about Andy Roddick.

Gonzo has the best forehand in the biz.

Amelie's and El Gato's backhand mechanics are so beautiful, I am reduced to tears when watching them play.

Serena and Andy sure have wicked serves.

I model my own tennis game after Fabrice Santoro (I don't play, but if I did, he'd be the one).

Tim Henman is the best player to never win a Slam.

My favorite obscure player is Simone Bolelli.

DISLIKES

I've you're talking smack about most of the WTA, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

Andy Murray is the whiniest player on either tour.

Dr. Ivo has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching Lleyton Hewitt play.

Rafa's pre-serve ritual is irritating and distracting.

Mikhail Youzhny bugs me for no particular reason.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be Nicolas Keifer, Michael Russell, Fernando Gonzalez, Nicolas Massu, Feliciano Lopez, David Ferrer, Marat Safin, and Lleyton Hewitt (only to see if the rumors are true).

However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw Roger Federer naked.

I would consider going gay/straight for Sania Mirza, Severine Bremond, Gisela Dulko, and Serena Williams.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting drunk with tennis player, my posse would consist of Marat, AndyR, Amelie, Serena, Jose "Puff, Puff, Pass" Acasuso, Mary "Born Again" Pierce (just to see if she'd get drunk.)

Todd Martin would make the best conversationalist.

Alex Bogomolov, Jr. is the player most like to end up in prison, while Guillermo Coria may one day end up in an insane asylum.