[bashansasasasa]

Well hello Monster!

I couldn't even finish reading your email (cuz I almost puked - lol) and it won't come as any surprise I disagree. Your arguments are old, outdated and boring. Given that I"m femail, I"ve had them spoken AT me (by men and women) and I"M tired of listening. They have been mobilized for YEARS to perpetuate inequality and sexist power relations that privilege men as if they are inherently meant to be leaders merely because they won the penis lottary. balderdash.

However, I don't even feel like engaging to the degree where I would point out the weaknesses in your argument and make a contrary one.

Instead, all I have to say is that you are entitled to organize your relationships however you want. You are responsible for your own actions and you own it. You can treat your partners in a manner you like.

Your partner will own her actions and her responses to your treatment. You may find that her response would be to leave the relationship and enter one characterized by equality. And, in light of your view, you'd likely be supportive of her decision.

So bazinga! to you.

I, on the other hand, will enter into a relationship where our respective strengths are mobilized to the best vantage. If I'm with an electrician, I"m not going to trump his opinion on construction and/or electrical matters. Likewise, I would expect my expert opinion on other matters related to my strenghts, educational background and life experience be valued. And, through dialogue, a decision can be made together. That has always worked for me. I have never been 'trumped' by some man and I've never trumped some man.

I have never once encountered that "stalemate" scenario you described. Ever. Like...who has? Maybe only those unwilling to budge or listen to another person's view.

Now look what you made me do -- I wrote more than I wanted and still didn't address the weaknesses of your argument or make an alternative one. jeesh.

over and out!

KitKat