[gariharlj]

This is one of the reasons it took me so long to leave. I came from a broken home and a f***ed up father and never, ever wanted that for my children. I cried, pleaded and prayed but every single time I prayed it got worse. Then I realized that THAT was my answer. No GOD doesn't want us to divorce but he doesn't want us to suffer either. Feeling like a failure, hurting for my children and wondering if I was disappointing GOD kept me going through continual pain for 12 years. My children are 4 years old and the other hasn't been born yet and yes it hurts. Every single day I look at my beautiful son and mourn him not being in a two family household anymore. But which is worse, leaving or allowing him to grow up and see the lies and dysfunction and continue that to some woman later in his life?

I left for me but mainly for my children to know true love and have positive relationships in their futures.