[cakaeroryrere]

Thanks everybody for giving me some ideas as to what this is all about,, and once I figure it out "for sure and definite" I will be sure to let you know what it was,,,so that it can help others,, and we can keep a log of what works for each of us..

Ok,, here is what I have evaluated since making this post..

1. The diet soda MAY have a link,, however I have cut them down so much and still have a problem that if it is linked, them I will have to cut them out completely.. this is my next step.. as of today, no more soda for the next week, to see if there is a link..

2. Stress is at a high right now. With hubby being gone,, and Navy wives being at their worst,, many of them are coming to me for reassurances.. I have had to cut my ties with many of them and completely shut them out, because of the toxicity that they bring to my life..

3. School starts for the kids on the 18th,,, and for me on the 25th.. While I know this is a good thing,, I always get the "jitters" as it comes closer. It's kind of stupid to be 33 years old, and still get jitters about school,, but it does happen.

4. I have a history of nerve problems that create gastrointestinal disturbances.. I started getting "nerve related ulcers" when I was 12 years old.. Stress can do me in quick.. but I am on Paxil to help with that, and I guess under the circumstances,, I should have increased my dosage by 10 mg per day,, until this period gets under control.. This is something that I am also going to take into consideration.

5. Email communications with my hubby have been few and far between. I didn't think it was having an impact on me, until yesterday, when I got yet another 2 sentence email that basically said,, "he's having a hard time, and can't talk to me about it"... it really put me in the toilet.. but today he called me, and we talked about it,, and he is just afraid that I will worry more if he vents about things. I explained that it is vitally important that we continue to talk about things,, as if we were in the same house still,, because otherwise,, the worry only get worse, and we will have to deal with an "eggshell" period for that much longer when he gets home.. We had a great talk,, and I think this could also have been part of my problem.

6. As far as my hunger levels go,, I have been eating alot.. but I haven't gained any weight back.. but after thinking it over about "what" I ate, I realized that I wasn't getting hardly any vegetables.. and was opting for an abundance of protein and very high fat foods..I am going to keep a watch on this,,, and make sure that I keep my vegies in the mix better.

7. Another diet related thing is, I had incorporated nuts (almonds/macadamia) into my diet.. However, I had done this several weeks ago... Then I realized that I wasn't just eating a couple every now and then... I was getting a handful every time I walked past the bowl.. So,, bye bye nuts.

8. Not drinking enough water.. this started when I went back home.. I was not getting nearly enough water.. and then when I got back to my real home,,, I was late to add it back to my plan.. The last couple of days, I have had water and only water, and it seems to be helping.. I don't know if it was the soda (as mentioned) or the fact that I was barely getting 16 oz of water per day..but I have had some relief since adding back in the full 64-70 oz of water per day.

9. Another thing about the hunger... I also realized that while I was eating all the time,, I was opting for "snacking" instead of actual food. Then when I would sit down to a meal,, I was ravenous.. and wanted to go back for not only seconds, but thirds!!!! So,, without realizing it,, I had let myself, become almost starved, because I wasn't making myself plan.

Ok,, as you can see,,, I was sssoooo wrong about things being the same, and not doing anything differently.. but it really took me having to sit down and evaluate every part of my routine for the last couple of weeks to find out what was going on.. It's absolutely amazing, how things can add up and before you know it,, you are in trouble in some way.. All I was paying attention to, was the carbs and exercise,, and I had inadvertently let the rest of my life go to sh*t...

So,, everybody,,, if you find yourself experiencing negative effects,, then sit down and MAKE SURE you have slipped into a trap of security and BLINDNESS,, like I did!!!!

I have alot of work to do,,, with both my diet, exercise, and awareness of my "interemotions"... Hope my little venture helps someone to realize what my be contributing to some of their problems..