[BostonDoctorTTT]

Loneliness is bad, however I gave some copying strategies, which may or may not help. Also thinking this is bad would make it worse, so better to think positive, and downplay it, while at the same time you do things to change the situation as others have advised in this thread. We live in a very difficult time, modern life tends to make us all very distant from one another, we are all less willing to get close to others, many of us wear social masks to protect ourselves from harm. We also live in a mass culture and if we are not part of it we are isolated.

It is difficult to meet the right people, even when trying to see the good in people, they tend to disappoint us. I too am struggling with the same thoughts and feelings, though I am not a good Muslim myself...I find it difficult to be with like minded people, though as a Muslim one should have the ability to be open and inviting with any type of person and no matter what the situation...we are not harsh, arrogant or proud, others should be attracted to our open natures. Does that mean we compromise? No, it just means we are assertive, but not joyless.

Try Futtuwa


Chivalry (futtuwa) and courtesy (adab) are actually essential parts of the Sufi path. Sufism's inward aspect consists of traveling the Path and the traversing its stations to attain the level of subsistence-through-God (baqa). Its outward aspect consists of the tradition of chivalry which constitutes the development of the attributes of perfect humans.

In the pre-Islamic Middle East tradition of chivalry, chevaliers had consideration for others; self-sacrifice; devotion; the helping of the unfortunate and unprotected; kindness towards all created beings, keeping one's word and self-effacement. They were comitted to a particular code of etiquette and conventions.

The chivaliers were absorbed into Islam on it's arrival and it's spiritual focus on divine love.

The very essence of the nature of the Prophet Muhammad is chivalric which is why sufis and chevaliers became one.

It is the sufis that are the real chevaliers, or spiritual warriors, continually battling the armies of materialism with the swords of love and light and truth from the armory of the true Paradise they have discovered.

The perfect example of this level of control and chivalry is demonstrated by the conduct of Hadrat Ali ibn Abu Talib ( RA ) a companion of the Prophet ( SAW) who once , in the midst of battle was about to slay his opponent. As he raised his sword to strike, his enemy spat in his face.Hadrat Ali immediately dropped his sword & refused to kill his opponent, "what is wrong with you, why do you not strike ?" the man asked "because before you spat at me I was fighting you for the sake of Allah Almighty" Ali ( RA ) replied, "but after you spat I was fighting you because I was angry - and as a muslim I can only fight for Allah , never for my own Nafs."Upon hearing this, Ali's ( RA) opponent recongnized the nobility & truth of his words and immediately accepted Islam.