There are very few compitent sheikhs, so that would make sense. Tassawuff is not a fardh, and many cocepts within tassawuf are complex and hard to comprehend. If have not found a sufi Sheikh who has obtained fana fi Allah, than you should not take them as your murshid. Many turuq do not mention fana as much as Qadri and Naqshbandi. For example, Sheikh NUh and Sheikh Al yaqubi, shadhilis, do not teach any esoteric knowledge or fana based knowledge until the mureed hass reached a certain level. this is because many times a person who just enters a turuq brings with him many preconcieved notions, and nafsi inclinations. They first have the mureed perfect the Sharia, at the point where one has essentially anihilated his own nafs and adheres to the sharia in every aspect of life, he is ready for the next level. This is alsso done by Naqshbandis and Qadris, but they tend to talk about the esoteric more. This first level is the attainment of FanafiSheikh. The concept of fanafisheikh is for the begginer to annihilate his own desires and emmulate the Mursheed in every action and breath, if the Mursheed has obtained fanafirasol, than there are no actions the Sheikh says or does that Rasoolullah(SAW) would not do. If the Mursheed has not obtained this High makaam, then the person emmulating him will be doing his work for nothing, and it could even be considered Shirk. Like I said its like drops in an ocean, Allah is the ocean, Rasoolullah(SAW) is the first drop of pure water into that ocean, the Mursheed, who is following the example of Rasooluillah(SAW), has become the second drop of pure water, If the mureed emmulates his Mursheed he is emulating Rasoolullah(SAW). It is hard to explain without it seeming like the Sheikh is an object of worship or is infallable, it is also a hard concept to grasp, and is not a concept for those who are not innitioated into a tariqqa to ponder upon. If you do not have bayat to a qualified Mursheed, get one, and things will be made clear to you. No Qualified Mursheed is going to tell you to emmulate his every action, he will tell you to annihilate yourself and so that you and Rasoolullah(SAW) are indistinguishable. By following this action, you are obtaining fanafisheikh. Fanafisheikh entails that you obey your Sheikhs directives, without him telling you explicitly.