Thank you all for your replys and they are not offending me.. just broadning my view on the topic He looks like my brother, hes wayyyyy younger than mum hes like 23 and mums like 38! it's not about coming to england as they are minted and own loads of places in the ARAB WORLD. I think it is genuine, no hidden agendas but look further down and you will see my problem now. First of all everyone my aim in life IS to look after my mother, take her where ever I go- Provide for her and waite on her hand and foot. So in the sense of us siblings getting married and moving away is not really an issue as I WANT too and also feel that it's a MUST as everything my mother has sacrificed and done for us. Also in our religion.. Mothers are the PINICAL if not then ONE' of them. But then I know a son and a husband are two different things. :/ Sister 'firaswagner..if you read it all carefully, you will see that- the Proposed guy who wants to marry my mum, is my cousin brother- his dad and mine were brothers. and my mums mum-grandma and his mum are sisters. So therefore he's my mums cousin brother aswell. I would never let my mum ACTUALLY get married in that family, but there father was the same sort of menace.. mine was. So him and his family went through the same stuff mine did. If you get where Im going with this. If I really really wanted to I think I could maybe but MY MANLY EMOTIONS too a side and allow my mum to get married to him. But my mum has been speaking to him over the phone for the past couple of years. They also went to another country, where they both met too discuss ''marriage'' and all that comes along with it. But we were told by mum they were going somewhere for work, they've never been anywhere.. not even in the country so there were no suspicions and mum is a practicing woman. Now the fact that my mother went and did this is very wrong of them. But for this man too go along with it..goes against my principles completeley because if he wanted to do this marriage thing properly, he should have asked ME for my mothers handd in marriage right? but for him to ACTUALLY go to another country and meet my mother and too speak with them on the phone makes me very angry and it is very wrong. This was all going under my nose aswell. And for this reason Im just thinking nonono its not going to happen! Reason being is if he was a REAL MAN of DEEN with PRINCIPLES he would have asked me rather than going behind my back by talking to my mother!! I maybe 18 but I am very mature and streetwise so theres no excuse in this department. Also when we went abroad to visit them, we hung out, there were no barriers.. so its not like he COULDNT tell me. What do you think? and I know the above ^^ sounds a bit wrong about my mum doing this but at the end of the day it's an internet forum and nobody knows who I am, I would never and could never discuss this with anyone so please appreciate i am not a baygerath-which they call in the punjabi language-in english like have no self respect. and far as Iv'e heard.. apparantly Men dont want divorced women with kids :/