DiscussWorldIssues - Socio-Economic Religion and Political Uncensored Debate - View Single Post - How to get over our obsessions of things/people?

**estelle** · 03-28-2012, 08:51 PM

everyone for replying. I have found some comfort (for the time being). Normally I am okay but there are times I just get so emotional or something r someone will be remind me at home and its unavoidable and it just hurts so much. My heart literally hurts. I'm getting better with time but its not totally going to away. I ask Allah swt to turn my heart away from it if not against it as he is the turner of hearts, but I don't know why my dua is not being accepted

Most things I can give up if its not meant to be mine or can never have with time I will totally forget about it. But I don't know why I'm having problems with this one - its almost an obsession. I generally accept my fate and what ever is usually thrown at me - again somethings just take time but this one problem I have just doesnt seem to be going away.

I've also done Istihkara - on three different occasions over a long period of time. If at the time Allah swt turns your heart against something, then how can one years later 'regret' their decisions? or have their heart turned towards it now? It doesnt make sense

Brother Silat - out of curiosity - if the person your missing is not near you how do you blow on their forhead?

I'm also not too sure about reading onto someones clothes? That is usually associated with black magic?

I may have misunderstood your problem.

my previous posting I was referring to a person feeling heartbroken, lovesick etc that is permissible in Islam. This lovesickness maybe due to
1- eternal/permanent separation due to death, divorce and other reasons
2- temporary separation due to time factor such as work requirement, gone for hajj pilgrimage etc.

For children, separation from person(s) very close to them can lead to serious heartbroken/lovesick illness.

It is for this kind of case the above amal is recommended for.
The blowing is onto the patient (who is lovesick) foretop head. Not onto the head of the person he/she is missing.
For example a child who has lost his parent, and misses his parent very much, the blowing is onto the child's head.

This kind of illness can result it the complications below:
1- body temperature increase (fever)
2- restless while sleeping, nightmare ..
3- behavioural change usually from a cheerful person becoming quiet, timid, etc
4- becomes overly aggressive. Over sensitive and easily throw tantrum

This kind of illness if not treated can result in change in behaviour:
1- depress, distraught and becomes a quiet person
2- becomes stubborn/obstinate and hard hearted
3- rebellious
4- treat other as enemy
5- cruel to self and others
6- suicide (critical case)

On saying ruqyah on someone's clothes, it is not blackmagic / sihr.
When a child for example deeply misses his/her parent, when he/she smells the odour of his/her parent, this can affect the person psychologically. He/she will be reminded of his/her beloved parents. However, to treat the psychological "trauma", reciting ruqyah onto the child and onto the clothes of the person he/she misses, is just a part of ikhtiyar/effort of our du'a to ALLAH that ALLAH swt lifts and sooths the heavy feeling in his/her heart.
It is not to send something to the owner of the clothes via the ruqyah.

wallaahu a'lam.

03-28-2012, 08:51 PM	#13
estelle Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 505 Senior Member	everyone for replying. I have found some comfort (for the time being). Normally I am okay but there are times I just get so emotional or something r someone will be remind me at home and its unavoidable and it just hurts so much. My heart literally hurts. I'm getting better with time but its not totally going to away. I ask Allah swt to turn my heart away from it if not against it as he is the turner of hearts, but I don't know why my dua is not being accepted Most things I can give up if its not meant to be mine or can never have with time I will totally forget about it. But I don't know why I'm having problems with this one - its almost an obsession. I generally accept my fate and what ever is usually thrown at me - again somethings just take time but this one problem I have just doesnt seem to be going away. I've also done Istihkara - on three different occasions over a long period of time. If at the time Allah swt turns your heart against something, then how can one years later 'regret' their decisions? or have their heart turned towards it now? It doesnt make sense Brother Silat - out of curiosity - if the person your missing is not near you how do you blow on their forhead? I'm also not too sure about reading onto someones clothes? That is usually associated with black magic? I may have misunderstood your problem. my previous posting I was referring to a person feeling heartbroken, lovesick etc that is permissible in Islam. This lovesickness maybe due to 1- eternal/permanent separation due to death, divorce and other reasons 2- temporary separation due to time factor such as work requirement, gone for hajj pilgrimage etc. For children, separation from person(s) very close to them can lead to serious heartbroken/lovesick illness. It is for this kind of case the above amal is recommended for. The blowing is onto the patient (who is lovesick) foretop head. Not onto the head of the person he/she is missing. For example a child who has lost his parent, and misses his parent very much, the blowing is onto the child's head. This kind of illness can result it the complications below: 1- body temperature increase (fever) 2- restless while sleeping, nightmare .. 3- behavioural change usually from a cheerful person becoming quiet, timid, etc 4- becomes overly aggressive. Over sensitive and easily throw tantrum This kind of illness if not treated can result in change in behaviour: 1- depress, distraught and becomes a quiet person 2- becomes stubborn/obstinate and hard hearted 3- rebellious 4- treat other as enemy 5- cruel to self and others 6- suicide (critical case) On saying ruqyah on someone's clothes, it is not blackmagic / sihr. When a child for example deeply misses his/her parent, when he/she smells the odour of his/her parent, this can affect the person psychologically. He/she will be reminded of his/her beloved parents. However, to treat the psychological "trauma", reciting ruqyah onto the child and onto the clothes of the person he/she misses, is just a part of ikhtiyar/effort of our du'a to ALLAH that ALLAH swt lifts and sooths the heavy feeling in his/her heart. It is not to send something to the owner of the clothes via the ruqyah. wallaahu a'lam.
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