DiscussWorldIssues - Socio-Economic Religion and Political Uncensored Debate - View Single Post - Can someone please advise and educate me, so that I don't have this hatred...

**maonnjtip** · 03-21-2012, 08:42 PM

Sister, I said this happens to those who are my non-mahram. My mother and all my blood sisters are my mahram and so I respect them. My wife can never be a source of zina so that's an exception. But when it comes to my other non-mahram (including my cousins and neighbours, despite their closeness), then the defense mechanism kicks in. It is stories like the one you mentioned that I have such a defense mechanism. I want to make them know that I'm not a guy to mess with. Do you know what I mean now?

I understood you clearly the first time brother, maybe I didn't go in depth enough to explain properly but it's quite difficult to do this.
Yes my experiences haven't been pleasant. I think there are other ways that you can show that perhaps your a little too hostile for people.

I mean, everyone looks! Everyone stares. People outside the faith will never understand unless they educated themselves, and people in Islam get religion and culture completely mixed up and they will intertwine the two which is wrong.

You don't want to do anything you will live to regret, and it will all fall on you.

When I referred to heaven at your mothers feet, it was more for you to remember that one day these young women, will to be mothers, wives, and please remember that all these women you think badly of, they are someone's child, who was brought into the world and raised with love, just as my mother did with me, your mother with you. As a mother, all we can do is our best. As a wife, a sister, a daughter, granddaughter etc, the same is flipped it were the other way around.

I understand it is hard, I myself am someone who thinks deeply, can misread and read too much into things. I get irritated easily, but these are my flaws that I openly accept with hopes of improvement.

If you want to ignore other sisters because you feel this is the only solution that is your choice, keeping yourself to yourself isn't a bad thing, BUT like you said in regards to beard and turban...this too may attract more attention. I think no matter what, your never really going to resolve the situation, but learn from it. Adapt and find soltions.

I personally, do not ever think it is right to physically touch something that does not belong to you, including physical abuse.
Unless you are a parent, it is quite hard to relate. If my daughter came home to me and said a brother had beaten her for no reason, is unthinkable. My children are mine, who are you or anyone else to touch them? Peoples children are a precious gift.

Even those who are bad in the world, do you think they were born bad? Aren't all children born innocent?

Anyway...when you think of such things, just remember that if you were to follow through...the other people that will be effected and hurt. You may not care for these people, but if it was to happen to someone in your family, wouldn't you think the same?

03-21-2012, 08:42 PM	#20
maonnjtip Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 449 Senior Member	Sister, I said this happens to those who are my non-mahram. My mother and all my blood sisters are my mahram and so I respect them. My wife can never be a source of zina so that's an exception. But when it comes to my other non-mahram (including my cousins and neighbours, despite their closeness), then the defense mechanism kicks in. It is stories like the one you mentioned that I have such a defense mechanism. I want to make them know that I'm not a guy to mess with. Do you know what I mean now? I understood you clearly the first time brother, maybe I didn't go in depth enough to explain properly but it's quite difficult to do this. Yes my experiences haven't been pleasant. I think there are other ways that you can show that perhaps your a little too hostile for people. I mean, everyone looks! Everyone stares. People outside the faith will never understand unless they educated themselves, and people in Islam get religion and culture completely mixed up and they will intertwine the two which is wrong. You don't want to do anything you will live to regret, and it will all fall on you. When I referred to heaven at your mothers feet, it was more for you to remember that one day these young women, will to be mothers, wives, and please remember that all these women you think badly of, they are someone's child, who was brought into the world and raised with love, just as my mother did with me, your mother with you. As a mother, all we can do is our best. As a wife, a sister, a daughter, granddaughter etc, the same is flipped it were the other way around. I understand it is hard, I myself am someone who thinks deeply, can misread and read too much into things. I get irritated easily, but these are my flaws that I openly accept with hopes of improvement. If you want to ignore other sisters because you feel this is the only solution that is your choice, keeping yourself to yourself isn't a bad thing, BUT like you said in regards to beard and turban...this too may attract more attention. I think no matter what, your never really going to resolve the situation, but learn from it. Adapt and find soltions. I personally, do not ever think it is right to physically touch something that does not belong to you, including physical abuse. Unless you are a parent, it is quite hard to relate. If my daughter came home to me and said a brother had beaten her for no reason, is unthinkable. My children are mine, who are you or anyone else to touch them? Peoples children are a precious gift. Even those who are bad in the world, do you think they were born bad? Aren't all children born innocent? Anyway...when you think of such things, just remember that if you were to follow through...the other people that will be effected and hurt. You may not care for these people, but if it was to happen to someone in your family, wouldn't you think the same?
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