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**Trotoleterm** · 03-19-2012, 11:21 PM

Hello muslims,

Im here cause i need help, dont worry its only a few words.

I have two parents, a mom that cant walk, cant do anything without someone helping her, and a dad a crazy dad, who cant speak, who nearly walks on his own, but wehen he gets mad all of a sudden starts to act like a monster who wants to punch mom and anyone disagree with him in anyway.

Ok my problem is this I CANT HELP MYSELF ANYMORE, my life is the worst life you may have ever heard but whatever, this began since i was a child, oh by the way i live with my sister older than me (shes the one with my mom all the time) if shes not here i stay at home, my sister is miserable but try to get over it everyday, imagine someones help her mom like 25 times a day (everyday) day/night eating, brushing sleeping, going to toilet (which is the hardest) and many things...

Anyway i dont blame them as God did this to them or chose them to be like this (right ????) so what can i do about it, im getting crazy like my dad I CANT STAND THE PRESSURE.

Waiting for true muslims to answer if not then dont bother.

Note: we have another brother that doesnt bother about our family (he got married and visit us just to play on my pc and thats it)

Assalamu Alaikum

dear brother

sometimes when Allah puts us in a position we find difficult its because He like us.

Sa‘d ibn Abî Waqqâs (raa) said:

“I asked the Prophet (saws) who among the people are most severely tried?

He said, ‘The Prophets, then the right acting people, and so on down through various categories of people. Man will be tested according to the strength of his faith. The stronger his faith, the more severe his trial, and the weaker his faith, the lighter his trial. The believer will be continually tested until he walks on earth with all his wrong actions forgiven’.”

(al-Bukhârî)

__________________________________________________ _____

sometimes our difficult times are ways in which Allah is helping us develop as human beings.
__________________________________________________ _____

A chickpea in a pot leaps from the flame,
out from the boiling water,
Crying, "Why do you set fire to me?
You chose me, bought me, brought me home for this?"
The cook hits it with her spoon into the pot.
"No! Boil nicely, don't jump away from the one who makes the fire.
I don't boil you out of hatred.
Through boiling you may grow flavorful, nourishing,
and united with vital human spirit.
I don't inflict this suffering out of spite.
Once green and fresh, you drank rain in the garden;
you drank for the sake of this fire.

God's mercy precedes His wrath;
by God's mercy the sick ones suffer.
It has always been so; this is how God creates all that exists.
Without pleasure, no creatures would come into being.
Without creatures,
what could the burning love of the Friend consume?
Such sorrow may come that you might wish
to be free of this life.
yet the Grace of God will overtake His wrath,
once you are washed clean in the river of suffering.

Chickpea, you fed in the springtime;
now pain has become your guest.
Entertain him well, that he may return home grateful,
and speak of your generosity to the King.
Instead of your vision of good fortune,
the One Who Bestows Favor may come to you;
then all true blessings may be drawn to you.

Just as Abraham commanded his son:
'Lay your head before my knife
I see in a dream that I must sacrifice you,'
lay your head before God's knife,
that He may cut your throat like that of Ishmael.
He may cut off your head,
but only the one that is immune to death.
Such submission is the fulfillment of God's purpose
— seek this submission.

Maulana Rumi (ra)

__________________________________________________ ____

a man who has never been through difficult times stays soft like a boy, Allah is making you a man by this InshaAllah
__________________________________________________ ____

Its not easy being a young man in the best of times brother,

but thank Allah that you are not disabled like your mother or an unhappy aging man like your father.

You have to respect your parents but you don't have to cut your nose off to please them.

Keep looking and a good job will come soon InshaAllah and take it even if it is not what you were looking for,

you can always look for something better and it will put you in a different environment all day.

you are a graduate, working in any job can never take this away from you it can only open new doors InshaAllah

once you are working then you can marry and have a wife to console you yes?

At the end of the day your life is in Allah's hands, trust in Him.

03-19-2012, 11:21 PM	#18
Trotoleterm Join Date Nov 2005 Posts 415 Senior Member	Hello muslims, Im here cause i need help, dont worry its only a few words. I have two parents, a mom that cant walk, cant do anything without someone helping her, and a dad a crazy dad, who cant speak, who nearly walks on his own, but wehen he gets mad all of a sudden starts to act like a monster who wants to punch mom and anyone disagree with him in anyway. Ok my problem is this I CANT HELP MYSELF ANYMORE, my life is the worst life you may have ever heard but whatever, this began since i was a child, oh by the way i live with my sister older than me (shes the one with my mom all the time) if shes not here i stay at home, my sister is miserable but try to get over it everyday, imagine someones help her mom like 25 times a day (everyday) day/night eating, brushing sleeping, going to toilet (which is the hardest) and many things... Anyway i dont blame them as God did this to them or chose them to be like this (right ????) so what can i do about it, im getting crazy like my dad I CANT STAND THE PRESSURE. Waiting for true muslims to answer if not then dont bother. Note: we have another brother that doesnt bother about our family (he got married and visit us just to play on my pc and thats it) Assalamu Alaikum dear brother sometimes when Allah puts us in a position we find difficult its because He like us. Sa‘d ibn Abî Waqqâs (raa) said: “I asked the Prophet (saws) who among the people are most severely tried? He said, ‘The Prophets, then the right acting people, and so on down through various categories of people. Man will be tested according to the strength of his faith. The stronger his faith, the more severe his trial, and the weaker his faith, the lighter his trial. The believer will be continually tested until he walks on earth with all his wrong actions forgiven’.” (al-Bukhârî) __________________________________________________ _____ sometimes our difficult times are ways in which Allah is helping us develop as human beings. __________________________________________________ _____ A chickpea in a pot leaps from the flame, out from the boiling water, Crying, "Why do you set fire to me? You chose me, bought me, brought me home for this?" The cook hits it with her spoon into the pot. "No! Boil nicely, don't jump away from the one who makes the fire. I don't boil you out of hatred. Through boiling you may grow flavorful, nourishing, and united with vital human spirit. I don't inflict this suffering out of spite. Once green and fresh, you drank rain in the garden; you drank for the sake of this fire. God's mercy precedes His wrath; by God's mercy the sick ones suffer. It has always been so; this is how God creates all that exists. Without pleasure, no creatures would come into being. Without creatures, what could the burning love of the Friend consume? Such sorrow may come that you might wish to be free of this life. yet the Grace of God will overtake His wrath, once you are washed clean in the river of suffering. Chickpea, you fed in the springtime; now pain has become your guest. Entertain him well, that he may return home grateful, and speak of your generosity to the King. Instead of your vision of good fortune, the One Who Bestows Favor may come to you; then all true blessings may be drawn to you. Just as Abraham commanded his son: 'Lay your head before my knife I see in a dream that I must sacrifice you,' lay your head before God's knife, that He may cut your throat like that of Ishmael. He may cut off your head, but only the one that is immune to death. Such submission is the fulfillment of God's purpose — seek this submission. Maulana Rumi (ra) __________________________________________________ ____ a man who has never been through difficult times stays soft like a boy, Allah is making you a man by this InshaAllah __________________________________________________ ____ Its not easy being a young man in the best of times brother, but thank Allah that you are not disabled like your mother or an unhappy aging man like your father. You have to respect your parents but you don't have to cut your nose off to please them. Keep looking and a good job will come soon InshaAllah and take it even if it is not what you were looking for, you can always look for something better and it will put you in a different environment all day. you are a graduate, working in any job can never take this away from you it can only open new doors InshaAllah once you are working then you can marry and have a wife to console you yes? At the end of the day your life is in Allah's hands, trust in Him.
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