[cepAceryTem]

I was wondering people especially the elders (and parents themselves) emphasize how important a parent's position is e.g. they should be respected, obeyed, looked after in old age etc...

I've never actually been a masjid and heard a talk on the rights of children, this leads on from another sisters post who commented on being abused as a child. Alot of the time the abusers are normally close relatives or the parents themselves.

Most parents are quite merciful and compassionate for their children and for obvious reasons but there is large minority of parents who have no respect for their children, don't fully fulfill all their obligations as parents yet demand a lot more in return.

e.g. children are mostly clumsy, and will easily spill a full glass of water, but does that deserve a slap (i mean a whack, full swing etc...) across the face? What does that teach a child?

another example is parents who don't pay any attention to a child's education but when they grow up humiliate them in front of others by saying "look his son is a doctor and you're only a taxi driver" etc...

Bismihee Ta'aala

Asalamualaikum


I am glad you brought this topic up. I was actually discussing this with some-one else a while ago. I think that instead of focusing so much on the rights of a parent, we should focus on the rights of the child.

I say this because children are not being brought up properly, and this is the parents fault. Where I live, I have seen high schoolers out all night. Before I moved out and went to college, my parents made sure I was in the house by ten o'clock. I use to get very upset, but now that I am older I understand why they did this. My uncle use to say that people only do haram things at night and therefore it was no use to go out past 11.

I use to get angry with him, but its true. My friends only use to hang out with girls or do drugs late at night. There was nothing beneficial done. It seems like parent don't even care where their children are.

Not only that, but parents are not raising their children properly. Both parents usually work, leaving the children to raise themselves. Even if only one parent works, the father usually works so many hours that he doesn't spend any-time with his own children.

How can get children learn manners and the rights of the parents if their own parents don't teach them this? Children learn from their parents and imitate them. If the parents don't do their own children's tarbiyah, then they are to blame to why their children are bad.

People care so much about education, but they don't raise them up islamically or care as much for the deen. They send their children for one hour a week to some aalim so that he could teach them some manners. How is that going to benefit!?

I don't understand parents, and then they come back and complain that my children don't treat me properly. If they raised their children properly from the beginning, then none of this would have happen in the first part.

This is why it is so important that we start talking about the rights of the children more than the rights of the parents, in my opinion.


And Allah (SWT) knows best