What makes you think you will be 'ostracized'? Bro you have heard Sh. Husain's 'Fundamentals of Tasawwuf' series. So you know how much he questioned and pestered his murshid before giving bay'ah. These are valid questions and someone in the know would be making a big mistake in not answering them. You can see we are all clutching at straws here, and you're not getting the answers you want so why don't you go and ask the people who know?