DiscussWorldIssues - Socio-Economic Religion and Political Uncensored Debate - View Single Post - why do men marry secret wives and how do they maintain fairness

**glamourcitys** · 04-20-2011, 02:21 AM

I disagree with many points raised by br Nawawi619 and sis with post #23.

Who decided the norm to be one? It might be a westerner norm but at least not the natural one. All the time when we have discussions on multiple wives, out of a sudden we encounter the barriers of "justice" and "equality". Why do we force something which is already known and to be abide by even in monogamous marriages? For an unsatisfied married man delving into sins are far more greater than perhaps neglecting just behavior - which he can reconcile now and then. Divorces are not only happening because husbands are headless of their duties, but also there are many cases where we have arrogant monstrous grumpy greedy wives who grossly neglect and leave their husbands unsatisfied. Yet all the time, they demand and demand and demand. This picture is not general, but such stereotypical wives do exist.

To my assessment multiple marriage breaks down this arrogance by molding and melting first wife into an ideal state of obedience, love and humbleness.

So what if man marries just for pleasure, something that he can't find at home with his first.

Well the main reason of marriage is to save your nafs from doing zina, in other words for gaining pleasure. Each and every person in this world marries the first time for this reason only unless he can get it for free without having to support a wife.

Secondly, if we just read Surah Nisa ayat 3:

Allah says that marry the women you like (who look good to you.. ) two, three, four......

So the norm is 2,3,4 and if there is a weak person by chance and he can't support more than one wife then he should stay with one.

So Allah is allowing you to marry for pleasure and we make it a crime to marry for pleasure.

04-20-2011, 02:21 AM	#28
glamourcitys Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 570 Senior Member	I disagree with many points raised by br Nawawi619 and sis with post #23. Who decided the norm to be one? It might be a westerner norm but at least not the natural one. All the time when we have discussions on multiple wives, out of a sudden we encounter the barriers of "justice" and "equality". Why do we force something which is already known and to be abide by even in monogamous marriages? For an unsatisfied married man delving into sins are far more greater than perhaps neglecting just behavior - which he can reconcile now and then. Divorces are not only happening because husbands are headless of their duties, but also there are many cases where we have arrogant monstrous grumpy greedy wives who grossly neglect and leave their husbands unsatisfied. Yet all the time, they demand and demand and demand. This picture is not general, but such stereotypical wives do exist. To my assessment multiple marriage breaks down this arrogance by molding and melting first wife into an ideal state of obedience, love and humbleness. So what if man marries just for pleasure, something that he can't find at home with his first. Well the main reason of marriage is to save your nafs from doing zina, in other words for gaining pleasure. Each and every person in this world marries the first time for this reason only unless he can get it for free without having to support a wife. Secondly, if we just read Surah Nisa ayat 3: Allah says that marry the women you like (who look good to you.. ) two, three, four...... So the norm is 2,3,4 and if there is a weak person by chance and he can't support more than one wife then he should stay with one. So Allah is allowing you to marry for pleasure and we make it a crime to marry for pleasure.
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