[quottrethew]

The question about how did I start with a dojo:

A very good sane-mild-mannered-friend of mine was a student at the dojo. He thought the practice could help when I was going through my psychosis. I asked my docs about it. They said if I could tolerate it, it would help with focus and improve my health. One can't practice swordsmanship easily without being in the here and now. My personality and history suits it.

I soon made friends with other students at both dojo's. My first Sensei was biased and was under the table about comments he made. I still stayed there two years due to my friendships and avoided Sensei. I was new to a dojo experience and bipolar experience. It took me a while to learn about curriculum's, safety, and some sort of ranking for promotion in a dojo. (At least to explain why I was being excluded from certain activities.) Today, I would have left after the first sit-down talk by my former instructor.

The disappointment thing: If this thread at least helps one person, informs one person, or gives one person inspiration, I'll be satisfied. I needed to take a break from the forum after that last post. I was getting emotional.

As for swordsmanship being a bad choice: I'd recommend speaking with a physciatrist first. They know your limitations if you have this support group. If there isn't a physician support, I'd recommend getting one if you are as disabled as I. My case is one of the extreme bipolar. There are many functioning bipolars out there that are famous. Or continue on with full lives.

As for swords being a bad choice: Just a different view without the stigma of 'powerful' swords. I have a license to drive and do so regularly. I think one ton of steel on wheels is far more damage inflicting than a katana or bokken. How many times does one catch themselves daydreaming while driving? Would you do that in practice? If I'm having problems concentrating and driving, I ask for someone else to drive me. If I'm having a hard time concentrating on my practice, I sit out and meditate.

Now this blood sugar thing? I'm very interested in the study. This is the first I've heard of it outside experience. When my mind is becoming disoriented, I find a sugary drink seems to snap me out of it for a while. Is this what it's talking about?

Sincerely,
Danette