..And on the 8th day, whislt munching a upon a golden bag of intergalactic PorkRinds did the Lord watcheth reruns of Gilligan's island. The lord did then gazeth downward upon the Earth, and unto his creation; Man. The Lord did see that man was helpless, and the target of much mirth. And whichevereth the Lord was bored, and the remote control of all channels that be, was missing since he last arose for a Holy sandwhich and beer to breaketh his labor; absolved was the Lord that he did seek to amuse himself in his creation of Man. And 'lo did sayeth the Lord: "Let Man have nipples, that he may amuse me." ....And it was so.