[hexniks]

Sister you will have to mend your ways and worry less about the ideology of your mother at this time. Shouting at mum is unacceptable at ALL times and frequent decompensation and angers at one whose role is so honorable in Islam is just unacceptable. I am not being judgemental because we all have their own wrongdoings but you will need to reflect alot about actual underlying personal Islamic engagements, purification, prayer sincerity and khushoo. YOu will have to ramp up especially Zikr and Quran and modify your personality inshAllah to the best you can.

I used to and still have very big ideological differences with my dad. I used to end up with arguments with him. I used to feel terribly bad after reflecting all the un-replaceable love, care and dedication he has given to me and every member of my family. For the past few years I have been away from home and have very good conversations with dad over phone and skype. When I go back home to meet my family annually I am simply a passive listener when dad goes into things which I ideologically disagree. I dont try to argue my ideologies with him at all and will even nod and acknowledge to most of the things he says simply to avoid arguments. Sometimes even ideas, values which I strongly disagree with and have different ways. You will have to compromise your expression and defense of ideals and values at least in conversation with your parents if you have learnt that arguing with them is futile. Just find ways to be circular. If she persists and insists tell her that you are being careful because alot of girls lives have been played around or something along that line. AS long as its conversational, theoretical and abstract you can be passive and answer to her with answers that appeal her if that ends an argument and leaves you both in a less belligerent temper. In reality you have the freedom to think and act according to your beliefs, reason, conscience not your parents but you just dont need to keep on showing that to them by arguing with them. Show them that you really still acknowledge their advise and ideas in matters even where you have diametrically opposite ideas.

SO in the end just be careful about all this anger you are venting out at someone who holds such an honorable role. Even if one's mum was a prostitute that still does not justify even a slur of anger and bad words to her according to the deen. As long as she literally and in practice make you do haram you have to learn to be very respectful to them. If I am not mistaken and others can correct me even certain haram are not a justification to behave rebelliously, it actually is 'associating partners with Allah' according to the Quran which Quran says now you can really be adamant and persistent and start rebelling against them. And inshAllah I am advising myself also with this post. Otherwise if she lets you worship Allah and doesnot tell you to worship idols or other things then you have to give her maximum respect.

Please read this short page link. It has seven short verses on respect to parents. Memorize them.
http://www.parsquran.com/eng/subject/parents.htm