[hotsaucemidl]

1. Play golf. Lots of successful people play golf. When you meet people on the course be sure to ask where they work. If they are business owners or bankers make friends immediately. If they have some physical job that is distant from treasury or management avoid them. Nobody wants to network with shipping clerks or truckers.

2. Drive a nice clean, newer coupe or sedan car. This sends a message that says, "I'm a serious minded professional." and little can be said in jest about such a vehicle. Avoid mini vans (soccer mom or dad jokes), sports cars (penis extensions), and trucks (hillbilly rides).

3. Do designer drugs like cocaine and pop trendy prescriptions because other successful people do this and you need to fit in.

4. Join secret societies often.

5. Find out what the boss believes and match that 100% regarding religion and politics. If he's an atheist, then you are. If he likes Obama, then you do. It's not important to be an activist for your parents' politics or cousin's church in the workplace.

6. Find out where your boss shops to buy groceries and also where he takes his clothes for dry cleaning. Don't linger when you go to those places, just play it so that he notices you "by chance" on occasion.

7. Avoid juvenile things like comic books, train collections, collecting beanie babies, GI JOEs and Transformer toys, buying fishing tackle, and collecting non-museum piece pistols or rifles. Successful people regard these things as signs of weakness when dealing with adulthood. They will be thought of as a form of Peter Pan plans to return to Neverland.