Simply put, it is hard for me to understand compassion. I understand on some basic level that it is good, but in my life, I have become rather paranoid, and see compassion as weakness. This coupled with my familiarity with anger has brought my practicing to a halt. While I can understand why anger is wrong, and why it causes suffering, I am so used to it, that it feels like home. A very disconcerting thought. Basically, I realize that I need to meditate on WHY anger and violence are bad, but its hard to come up with reasons as to why they are so, when I have been raised to believe that they are necessary in this rather dangerous world.