DiscussWorldIssues - Socio-Economic Religion and Political Uncensored Debate - View Single Post - A question on compassion, suffering, and doing the right thing

**Mark_NyB** · 01-09-2012, 12:21 AM

Hello 13greenpixies,

It is important to consider that one can not free from suffering other people. The responsibility of suffering is for each person.

It looks like you have been a wonderful friend showing your best skills to advice her.

We all have limits at helping people. Even professional therapists have limits and we have to be clear about this.

Your advices have been given with outstanding compassion toward her suffering but seems that your friend has to realize that she is the only one that has to free herself form suffering, look for professional help and dedicate effort for her healing.

Your story has touched me because I constantly found my self in such troubles always trying to help people with the Buddha teachings.

The results have been quite similar to what you have experienced.

I have lost some friends because of that. We try to help people and show them the Dhamma. We all are learning. We are not fully enlightened so we have shortcomings.

There is a point where we can not go further trying to help people and what is important is our own learning toward awakening because the teachings of Buddha are about a personal commitment.

You did you best. That is a sign of compassion and loving kindness toward others suffering but we have limitations.

Don't worry. I think it was a good decision to take a healthy distance from your friend.

She has to deal with her personal problems and to be responsible about them. That is her task, not yours.

IMO, you did the right thing...

01-09-2012, 12:21 AM	#2
Mark_NyB Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 544 Senior Member	Hello 13greenpixies, It is important to consider that one can not free from suffering other people. The responsibility of suffering is for each person. It looks like you have been a wonderful friend showing your best skills to advice her. We all have limits at helping people. Even professional therapists have limits and we have to be clear about this. Your advices have been given with outstanding compassion toward her suffering but seems that your friend has to realize that she is the only one that has to free herself form suffering, look for professional help and dedicate effort for her healing. Your story has touched me because I constantly found my self in such troubles always trying to help people with the Buddha teachings. The results have been quite similar to what you have experienced. I have lost some friends because of that. We try to help people and show them the Dhamma. We all are learning. We are not fully enlightened so we have shortcomings. There is a point where we can not go further trying to help people and what is important is our own learning toward awakening because the teachings of Buddha are about a personal commitment. You did you best. That is a sign of compassion and loving kindness toward others suffering but we have limitations. Don't worry. I think it was a good decision to take a healthy distance from your friend. She has to deal with her personal problems and to be responsible about them. That is her task, not yours. IMO, you did the right thing...
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