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Old 12-03-2011, 06:01 AM   #10
ovH9wfSJ

Join Date
Oct 2005
Posts
514
Senior Member
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Have you been meditating long Nathan?
My experience is that I was an anxious young person and never spoke to others about a free floating sense of anxiety that I had - I used this to drive myself and it served me well to achieve outward success - high grades at school, social connections etc.
I always sort of felt like a fake, as I knew somehow this wasn't what it was all about and if people saw the real anxious me which I perceived was unacceptable and flawed it would all fall apart - and even as a young child I sensed it somehow needed to yet didn't know quite how.
A drug induced experience in my teens precipitated my first full blown panic attack and an even stronger sense that the " I " concept I was living by was restricting me.
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