[BUMbaronos]

Thank you for your responses. I appreciate the advice. I guess I have the "sin" judeochristian idea ingrained in me from being raised in a devout Christian family. I don't believe in sin and i'm not a Christian anymore but I still feel like I have "sinned" against the Buddha by cussing him or the Buddhist religion and getting mad and throwing my book. I think that is what happened. I just feel guilty I guess.

I feel like this guilt I have is in the way of me being happy as a person. I don't know what to do about it. I guess i'm worried that i'll always feel unworthy of ever being Buddhist. I don't know if I should feel this way or not. I don't know if cursing at Buddha or Buddhism is something that is unforgivable. Am I just looking at Buddhism the wrong way?

I'm sorry if i'm being annoying.