DiscussWorldIssues - Socio-Economic Religion and Political Uncensored Debate - View Single Post - New to Buddhism and it doesnt sit well with spouse

**lipitrRrxX** · 11-19-2011, 10:28 AM

Hi Cal,

I've had a similar experience with my boyfriend of 7 years. Before I found Buddhism, I was his partner (a participant in all of the vices I soon gave up.) I was looking for something more in my life, and to stop the cycle of self-destruction. I was also very concerned for his health and secretly hoped that he would see a change in me and follow my example. As a result of the sudden changes, he may have seen me as "pious". I can honestly say that we no longer have much in common.

The unhealthy things that attracted us to each other in the beginning of our relationship, no longer exist for me. We were both suffering, and angry, in our own ways. I don't have the desire, or need to numb my senses or drown my sorrows. I read a book, or meditate. I have also found that explaining the benefits of Buddhism to others that don't want to listen is fruitless. Our relationship is ending (his choice, not mine).

My new lessons are accepting change, and non-attachment I guess. A 25 year marriage is admirable, and I'm sure there have been many hurdles, but the core of your marriage sounds strong.

11-19-2011, 10:28 AM	#12
lipitrRrxX Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 482 Senior Member	Hi Cal, I've had a similar experience with my boyfriend of 7 years. Before I found Buddhism, I was his partner (a participant in all of the vices I soon gave up.) I was looking for something more in my life, and to stop the cycle of self-destruction. I was also very concerned for his health and secretly hoped that he would see a change in me and follow my example. As a result of the sudden changes, he may have seen me as "pious". I can honestly say that we no longer have much in common. The unhealthy things that attracted us to each other in the beginning of our relationship, no longer exist for me. We were both suffering, and angry, in our own ways. I don't have the desire, or need to numb my senses or drown my sorrows. I read a book, or meditate. I have also found that explaining the benefits of Buddhism to others that don't want to listen is fruitless. Our relationship is ending (his choice, not mine). My new lessons are accepting change, and non-attachment I guess. A 25 year marriage is admirable, and I'm sure there have been many hurdles, but the core of your marriage sounds strong.
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