[kmjbbT3U]

As far as being in a relationship without the kind of unhealthy attachment I see Buddhism teaching the hazards of, I'd like to bring up how I personally approach my own relationship.

A lot of people believe that (among other ridiculous criteria) a relationship has to be forever to "count." Look at the couple in AN 4.55 Samajivina Sutta: Living in Tune. The advice they were given is excellent, but I'd go one further and say that demanding, needing, or expecting that their relationship be eternal is itself a sign of a problem. Like all things, a relationship is impermanent just because that is the way things are. However, just because it isn't around forever or may not be good forever doesn't mean it wasn't good now.

My partner and I have been together for over six years, and at no point have we promised to be together forever. Our vows didn't put any kind of time frame. Our vows are our vows for as long as they work, and when they stop working we will either renegotiate our commitment or stop having one altogether. Neither option means that the time we spent was somehow delegitimized by its lack of eternal permanence.

Relationships of all kinds can be tremendous learning opportunities. I know with certainty that I am a better person now than when I met my partner, and our relationship continues to give me opportunities to learn and practice lessons I have learned both from dharma practice and other sources. I've learned more this way than I ever could have from monastic life, so I think that neither I nor the Buddha have any room to complain about romantic bonds or their effect on dharma practice.