[paulaglober]

Last week I had to call the vet out to put my too old 35 year old ladies to sleep, dont panic, they were horses. It was very calm and dignified. The vet injected them with what is basically an overdose of anaesthetic, it is very quick. We talk to our horses during this time telling them to go and find who has gone before and not to be scared and we thank them for their kindness, love and loyalty during their lives.We also try to stay calm so not to worry them. When we do this we sit with their heads in our laps stroking their faces and looking in their eyes. Even before their hearts stop beating something leaves them and their eyes change. There is a moment of complete understanding, a time for knowing it is what is meant to be. It an enveloping feeling and then there is nothing. The animal on the ground becomes a carcass with no pull at all and the eyes are totally vacant. The vet monitors the heart beat at all times. It feels like their soul leaves them before they are actually dead, a moment of being neither here or there, a moment where they stay around us in the air to say goodbye. It is all in the eyes. I wish I could explain the differences that happens in the eye during this phase to you more, but at least I have tried. I thought it might be a topic we could discuss further ................