in war as well as in puranas ,taking away wife of the enemy is a sort of vengeance. we can not think any justice in comparing with common citizen. when draupathy herself felt that her husbands lost the control over her & helpless, on what basis she expected pandavas help.she was paying for her foolish act of teasing dhuriyothana during her swayamvaram.If it is the duty of a husband to protect his wife in happiness and sorrow ,it applies to the wife also. guruvayurappan