Why do most people prefer to marry thier own kind?
 

Is it because its human nature to marry and have children with someone who looks similar to you, or is it because of cultural similarities? Lets hear your thoughts.

Cultural pressure/similarities, religious traditions/similarities, societal pressures, etc.

That's the main ones I could think of.

I think it's because every human group evolved to adapt to its environment. Hence, if you are black you are going to be attracted to black people, since in the environment to which you are adapted dark skin is more adaptive than light skin. Likewise, a nordic will be attracted to blond people, since low melanin levels are an adaptive trait in the environment to which nordics are adapted. This applies to every human feature, not only to skin tone.
Cultural differences are, in my opinion, important for long-term relationships, but they are irrelevant in terms of sexual attraction.

Cultural I think is quite important. That is, if your very into your roots then you can relate better to someone who is of your same ethnicity. At least I do.

For me it would be because of cultural similarities, I wouldn't mind marrying an afro-mexican since we share the same culture, we would both be mexican and so would our kids. But for me its definitely because of culture.

It also depends on how a society identifies itself. Some cultures, like the Balkans, mainly identify themselves based on their ethnicity whether they are Muslim or Christian. Yet in other cases religion matters more in cases where ethnicity is irrelevant (Like some places in India where the caste system isn't the norm due to the presence of other religions like Christianity and Islam). In my case it would be more acceptable if I married someone who was a non-Indian orthodox Christian than an Indian Hindu or Muslim.

It is related to the identity reaffirmation and the self-esteem.

Loving someone similar and being loved by someone similar means a person loves himself and is happy with his family.
People want to be accepted by their peers, first the parents, secondly the friends and lastly a romantic interest. Being loved by a similar is a reaffirmation of the identity.

Why not?

Unless people don't like their own culture or group, there's no reason to go look for something else.

Cultural similarities is a huge factor, but also because i want my children to look like me.

I think its cause we people like what we know, even though we think we know what we like. It applies to everything- the look, behaviour, culture, taste etc, one factor or another will prevail. Thats why daughters of alcoholics marry often alcoholics, cause it is so strong mechanism- even pathological relationship is good cause it is 'know territory'.

When it comes to the look, theres no answer. There are theories that men look for women similar to their mothers and daughters to their fathers, but I dont think its that simple, but maybe there is something in it. I believe its wider, you just store some memories in your head since early childhood and some faces, shapes, colours, smells will stuck positively in your mind and influnece your choices when to comes to a partner, preferred hobby, when you like to go on holiday and people you trust.

Have you ever had this feeling (cause I have had it many times) that you meet someone completely new and at the very start you like them or give them a lot of credit, because they seem 'familiar' to you, it may also work the other way, to dislike someone.


Summing up, it probably depends on life-long experiences, mainly from childhood/early years but it does not always work directly, it depends what and how your brain stored things. I believe it is in 80 or 90% subconscious choice.

This.http://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...s/thumbsup.gif

^I agree on that.

Also I dont want to have foreign looking kids, when I return to Turkey I want that my kids will be able to fit in Turkey with their look just like me http://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...milies/yes.gif or at least in 1 region of Turkey they should fit regarding looks.

That's true, or how about those kids who tend to identify with one side rather than both, I wouldn't like that. Ive seen that here in the USA and I wouldnt want my half mexican son/daughter to reject my side and identify more with his mother's side. But thankfully my son is 100% mexican http://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...ilies/grin.gif

I wouldnt like that as well, actually that would offend me a lot ! Actually my first choice would be a Turk to marry anyway http://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...s/thumbsup.gif

I don't know what you had in mind but you would have to go pretty extreme for your children not to fit in Turkey.

MESELA: Dusunsene yari zenci yari Turk, o cocuk Turkiyede boku yedi. Ben zaten zencileri cekici bulmuyorum, bence yakisikli degiller ama bir kaza oldu, ask gozu kor etti, ee o cocuk zenci olarak kesinlikle dislancak.

zenciyi anladik canim, pretty extreme dedik yahttp://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...lies/laugh.gif

Goooooodddddd, apart from that...

Well otherwise if I would get on with a European man very very very well and we really love each other, we really find each other attractive .... hell...Okay I would do an exception and marry him, since the child still would fit in Turkey, the child would look probably West Turkish http://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...lies/laugh.gif

Ama aslinda iyi birsey, disaridan devamli iyi genleri turkiyeye getirmek lazim.

Affinities is the reason people do this, whether emotional, cultural, racial, social, psychological, etc.