[shashaffff]

Well,...though I have been in Thailand only 3 times, and have not lived there as long as some previous commentators, I can comment only from my experiences, and to me, as far as making eye contact, Thais are no different than people in U.S...As I walk down Chicago`s streets, many people-strangers-don`t want to make eye contact with me, I guess I look suspicious to them,..and then some people/strangers, I don`t want to make eye contact with-`cause they look suspicious to me...And we are ALL human, we think of our own safety first, and politeness/friendlines/civility second....Personaly I don`t mind eye contacts (they look better than glasses) just as long as it is not their fingers my eyes > contact

[zlopikanikanzax]

funny thing is if your eyeballs were like chameleon's, you'd get no eyecontact at all. LOL

[ireleda]

Yes, when just walking down the street, eye contact is very frequent and always followed by a very sincere smile.
I thought it was meant eye contact while in a conversation..

[Hervams]

It depends on the person and the amount of respect they give you sometimes that can determine whether or not they look you in the eye. Some shop vendors I clearly remember looking me directly in the eye and smiling trying to win my business.

I also have a group of business associates/friends who respect me so much that they always let me have the last word. Not trying to toot my own horn by mentioning this but they look down upon themselves a bit when I'm around and I think they're just intimidated a bit because they also speak without looking at me. They make suggestions and comments in short sentences looking away, I can clearly remember each one of them doing this as if they were almost afraid to speak. I have to remind them to look at me in the eyes so that I can trust them. They seem a bit self-deprecating and I think a lot of this stems from the disparity financial status and education. I honestly don't like feeling this way so I always remind them that we're all human but it doesn't seem to work. It's the same way some maids look down when they are working. Please don't misunderstand me, I'm just sharing.

[MormefWrarebe]

I am doing some research and I'd really like to ask everyone there another question please!

I need to find out if Thai people make eye contact with each other including strangers. Can anyone tell me?

[ireleda]

I have lived here for some years, and they might make eye contact with each other, but not often with us, they have a real hard time telling the truth , so not much eye contact..

[Gcromqgb]

Those farangs TD mentioned were probably trying to be naughty. Tsk tsk...

[QxmFwtlam]

You want eye contact? Got to local pubs on a weekend. You get sooooo many eye contacts that you wished your eyes are that of the chameleon, each eyeball contacting separate destination eyeballs different parts of the room at the same instant of time.

[zlopikanikanzax]

Yeah, both are a lil higher (physically) and one is a lot wider (physically fat). They both were just scholars. One was a married "yo. wassup" type(latino i think). Kept speaking spanish to me. I agreed with you at one point that they thought i looked young and so they could do anything they wanted to me. I didn't dress properly, though. lol I just looked like a skater girl with a skirt and no skateboard. The fat one was a divorced who craved to have a young Thai wife (I had to be with them while they visited a center that was full of young thai ladies and he was so obvious in wanting to eat them)

About the prettier comment without glasses, it duzn't work on me LOL cuz i'm not pretty no matter with or without glasses. LOL

Anyway, maybe just my bad luck that i always happen to meet bad mannered farangs often. LOL Or someone's just punishing me for being impolite with words. LOL

Hey but i liked one black girl from their group. She kept looking at me and seemed friendly. At one point, i wanted to say something to her:"Yeah, i agreed they are stupid". LOL

[shashaffff]

I will say no, ..it was not polite for strangers/farangs to ask you to take off your glasses (Only if he intended to punch you in the face) especialy if they were your reading glasses. And at your second incident, at board members dinner, again it was not polite of those Americans to ask your age (unless they are flirting/jesting with you) or to take off your glasses, but if they were higher up than you..if they were your bosses then I think they felt they had right/authority to ask you that-even if it is not most polite thing to do- (or maybe they just thought you would look prettier without glasses-as many women do)...I wear tinted sun glasses most of the time and no one asked me to take them off yet,(they better not, since eyewear is part of my entire "outfit" it would be equivalent of saying to me I don`t like your tie, or your shirt, or your hairstyle, or your mustache...it would be a personal "attack")..only immigration officers at Tokyo & Bkk. airports......and lastly it could be that those farangs were looking down on you (And felt that they could order you around-to take off your glasses) some Americans are arrogant even here between each others, and even more so when they go to another/Asiatic country..I heard about this from Phillipine people as well.

[zlopikanikanzax]

Speaking of making eye contact, if a person(s) is a lot taller than me and looking at him/them makes my neck tired. lol No, i won't try to keep my eye contact with them. Sometimes i speak quietly on purpose to make the person bends down a lil so that i can have eye contact with them. LOL

One foreign teacher at my uni assumed a female staff liked him because everytime he walked pass her, she would give an eye contact and smiled to him. LOL He asked around what to do and finally ended up with a letter to her. LOL

I hope he duzn't join this forum LOL

[JennyStewarta]

Ok, speaking of glasses. There were times that a farang(s) asked me to take of my glasses when i met them for the first time or someone introduced us to each other.

In any part of Farangland I am aware of, sunglasses are the only glasses you would ever remove when speaking to people you are being introduced to. If you were out in the bright sun, you might briefly remove your sunglasses while shaking hands, then it would be OK to put them on again. Wearing sunglasses indoors while speaking to people - and especially while being interviewed on camera - is not such a good look.

[Yswxomvy]

It depends on the person and the amount of respect they give you sometimes that can determine whether or not they look you in the eye. Some shop vendors I clearly remember looking me directly in the eye and smiling trying to win my business.

I also have a group of business associates/friends who respect me so much that they always let me have the last word. Not trying to toot my own horn by mentioning this but they look down upon themselves a bit when I'm around and I think they're just intimidated a bit because they also speak without looking at me. They make suggestions and comments in short sentences looking away, I can clearly remember each one of them doing this as if they were almost afraid to speak. I have to remind them to look at me in the eyes so that I can trust them. They seem a bit self-deprecating and I think a lot of this stems from the disparity financial status and education. I honestly don't like feeling this way so I always remind them that we're all human but it doesn't seem to work. It's the same way some maids look down when they are working. Please don't misunderstand me, I'm just sharing.

I understand what you mean. I was involved in a project where our team taught trainers/trainors from different Asian countries how to deal with adult learners (principles of andragogy). One of the most important concepts was to treat trainees as equals when in a learning situation, as opposed to teaching children where there's a big gap between the teacher and the student. There are many ways to achieve this, but what what is relevant to our discussion now is about establishing eye contact and addressing the trainers (or teachers) with their first names.

The countries represented included Thailand, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Malaysia, Nepal, Philippines, HongKong, Indonesia, etc.

About using eye contact, we noted that some Thais were comfortable about it, and some were not. We had a feedback sheet filled out by observers. It's the shy Thais who tended to look down. They also spoke in low tones and hardly smiled. On the other hand, the Thais who were rated highly on eye contact tended to smile more and looked enthusiastic. And so we suspected this was connected to self-confidence or personal habits. I must point out though that we did not make a professional study about this subject as this was not the focus of our project.

It is interesting, too, to point out that some male members from Nepal, Malaysia, Bangladesh and Sri Lanka (maybe I forget the other countries) WOULD NOT look at the the eyes or the body of the female members as in their culture that's considered rude! So the eye contact issue then might not be related to self-confidence.

On being on first-name basis with the trainers/teachers, many couldn't do it. They preferred to use a prefix of "Miss" or "Mister" before the first names of the team members.

Needless to say, our team had to make adjustments in our approaches to adapt to the cultural conditions of the different countries.

But as far as Thais are concerned, I note that they (waiters, hotel cleaners, sidewalk vendors, drivers, sales persons, etc) are comfortable establishing eye contact with ordinary visitors or tourists like me.

[favwebbb]

Yes, they do make eye contact with each other and strangers.

[MormefWrarebe]

So sorry, can't answer your question but I am doing some research and I'd really like to ask everyone there another question please!

I need to find out if Thai people make eye contact with each other including strangers. Can anyone tell me?

[zlopikanikanzax]

It depends on the person whom you are talking to too. Quick/short eyecontact is normal here. Thai people do it alot no matter with whom they are talking to. Thai people hundreds years ago were taught not to say what they had in mind (esp girls cuz it was considered rude and improper to do that) and i think that still effects some Thais nowadays that avoid making long/serious eyecontact just not to reveal what they are having in mind to others.

As for me, I have no prob making a long eyecontact while having a long conversation with strangers UNLESS i get the feeling the way they make eyecontact with me changes and makes me feel: i'm being judged, flirted with, or begged. I usually ignore the person who makes me feel that.

The certain person whom with i sometimes avoid to have eyecontact is my bf. LOL ẺÇèÒÁѹà¢Ô¹ LOL

(Keeping long eyecontact isn't easy when it comes to talking with someone who is handsome and happens to have a couple of sweet and sexy eyes? LOL Just asking. LOL)

[zlopikanikanzax]

Ok, speaking of glasses. There were times that a farang(s) asked me to take of my glasses when i met them for the first time or someone introduced us to each other. I said "no" when asked. They would find their way to make me take my glasses off, finally. Is that considered normal for westerns? Is that considered polite? Last time it happened was when i went to a welcome dinner (formal event) and I was one the host staff. Two american guests asked me to take my glasses off right there at the dining table where administrative board members gathered. The first thing they said to me was not a hi or a hello but "How old are you?" They didn't believe i'm 26. In the west, heard it's impolite when a stranger asks you how old you are? LOL Should i be a lil bit meaner when that happens again? (At the party, i kinda told them it was none of their business and i wouldn't be able to eat. lol)

[thakitt]

´Ç§µÒ ¤×Í Ë¹éÒµèÒ§¢Í§ËÑÇ㨠(duang dtaa keu nâa dtàang kŏng hŭa jai) – eyes are the window of the heart.

Yes, we do make eye contact, and we are taught to look at the eyes to see whether he/she is lying. If someone don't make eye contact, it might be something wrong with their personality, we have teasing words for those who don't make eye contact "are they ghost?" .

[markshome23]

if you walk down the street, about every second person passing you will make eye contact and smile. doesn't really happen back home, so first you keep on wondering what they want.
they avoid eye contact when they are embarrassed but that is the same in every culture I think.

[zlopikanikanzax]

oh forgot to tell i have short eyesight Never worn sunglasses too. LOL