[alicewong]

Interested to find out how thais seek forgiveness from the seniors (eg. parents) during festivals like Mother's Day or New Year's Day...I think they present them with flowers & incense on a tray right? And they prostrate, right?

Anyone can help explain the ritual in detail to me? Appreciate it lots.

kkk,
kj

[alicewong]

thank you very much pailin for sharing that. i do agree that atmospheres like that can make one go with the flow emotionally. and it can help strengthen the parent-child bond too, i guess

i didn't realise one had to kneel for so long! i thought just a wai, present the offerings (only flowers? no need incense?) and you can get up! 555...

in another asian culture, i understand that one also has to wish one's elders a long, healthy life while wai-ing to them and in return they get blessed by the elders who will put their open palm on the junior's head or shoulders.

i'm wondering if this asian tradition stemmed from the same source...hmmm...

kj

[Peretool]

555 You narrated a candid and humorous tale. I GUESS participants were crying because it was a sentimental moment--where some tender feelings were released. (Yes, Bucky--that happens a lot in Anthony Robbin's seminars and in other similar gatherings which strongly tap the affective domain.) But it's a good thing that you wept along. That demonstrated that you could at least sync emotionally. Or else there might have been some disappointment in you. You could even have been disowned instantly.

Just kidding.

[sessoorale]

It was complete silence. The first five or so minutes I was fully focused. After that, I kept my wai, but began sneaking my eyes around. Hmm... what are we supposed to be doing? I looked and everyone else was in deep thought -- no other eyes darting around. Okay... umm.. so I sat there some more. At the 20 minute mark, my legs began falling asleep and I was about to lose all concentration. Then I heard my sister...and the other children begin crying. Still in their wai, they were sobbing. Sobbing for what, I wondered? Sobbing as they release guilt (ask for forgiveness?) sobbing out of pure love for their moms? ...or sobbing because their legs were falling asleep, too? I pondered this for a while and then I heard my mom start crying. I lost it at that point. I couldn't feel my legs below the knee, my back was aching, there were no sounds at all except for those sobbing....and I started in. I lost it. I started sobbing along with them. I don't really know why.

Sound like one of those Anthony Robbin's seminars.....

[Savviioor]

Khao Jao, I'm not wholly sure about the concept of forgiveness to the elders....and hopefully someone can jump in. However I have participated in a Mother's Day ceremony at my high school in Trang.

All of the students gathered in the assembly hall and different teachers talked about the importance of parents. Students read essays aloud. Then six mothers were brought in and they were honored as special parents. My mom was chosen (I think just because she had a farang daughter) and a woman whose son was severely disabled was chosen. One woman was the mother of our top scholar. I don't remember who the other three were. They each gave brief statements on the secrets to great motherhood -- or something to that effect. They all sat in formal chairs in front of the assembled students. They then called up the children of these mothers. We wai-ed them formally and then sat at their knees wai-ing them for a very long time. We were crouched over the moms with our wai-shaped hands at their knees. My older Thai sister was at one knee, I was at the other. Very hard to describe.

It was complete silence. The first five or so minutes I was fully focused. After that, I kept my wai, but began sneaking my eyes around. Hmm... what are we supposed to be doing? I looked and everyone else was in deep thought -- no other eyes darting around. Okay... umm.. so I sat there some more. At the 20 minute mark, my legs began falling asleep and I was about to lose all concentration. Then I heard my sister...and the other children begin crying. Still in their wai, they were sobbing. Sobbing for what, I wondered? Sobbing as they release guilt (ask for forgiveness?) sobbing out of pure love for their moms? ...or sobbing because their legs were falling asleep, too? I pondered this for a while and then I heard my mom start crying. I lost it at that point. I couldn't feel my legs below the knee, my back was aching, there were no sounds at all except for those sobbing....and I started in. I lost it. I started sobbing along with them. I don't really know why. I certainly liked my Thai mom...but at that point, I'd only known her a month or so. After about 45 minutes, we were then asked to stand up and walk over to get flowered wreathes to give our moms. I could barely walk....slapping my legs to wake them up. I gave her the flowers and waied her again.

After the ceremony, I was walking back to my class, my friends came up to me and said, 'wow, you were really crying!' I, of course was very limited on my Thai at that point (1 month in) and thought they said, 'wow, you're really hot'. To which I replied, 'yes, it's very hot'. They looked at me like I was a moron... but that's another story!

[Snweyuag]

I thinks, in actually the way to asking for apologize with smile and Wai is the good way for Thai to show our accept a mistake and seek for forgivness from the seniors as usual.

And yes, we'll use a lei of flowers or flowers & incense on a tray when we're specially seek for forgivness as formal Thai tradition way.

With honestly, For Thai, I think we not have special chance for forgivness seeking. So we use many chances for show our respect, love and care to seniors such as Father's Day , Mother's Day, Teacher's Day and Family's Day , New Year Day and Valentine Day, Birth Day..etc, for show them our accept a mistake and seek for forgivness.