[Bxbhtjnr]

Hey all,
This is kind of funny, not that long ago I had a thread on her pages long about being depressed and what not over a girl. Like most of you said the hurt passed in time and now I find my doubting the person I am seeing now. To start this is the first time in a long time that I have been in a serious relationship and I think since I am older it kind of scares me. Like an early mid-life crisis. The girl I am seeing is awesome, I could go on and on about what makes her great but for some reason I want to meet other people too. I feel guilty even thinking about it, I am not the kind of guy who sleeps around (bit a germ freak) so It’s eating away at my conscience. There is a girl I have been chatting with through Match. (Where I met my current GF) and she wanted to know if I wanted to do dinner or drinks. So I guess the question is, does that make me a creep and is it cheating? Or does it make sense to make sure I am with the "one?"

[soipguibbom]

I'm going to presume that this is serious for now....

"So I guess the question is, does that make me a creep and is it cheating?"

Yes, it does and yes it is.


More to the point, what were you doing on match.com when you're in a relationship?

The grass is always greener until you lie on in. Nothing wrong with window shopping, just don't try anything on.

[br`lorance]

+1 for the above.

Easiest way to figure it out, how would you feel if she was on Match and hooking up dates?

[rJohutozsfds]

As above - att his point, tell the second party that you're already in a relationship, and you would like to see where that goes first, as anything else would be unfair to both women.

Of course, you're also going to get a bunch of stupid, immature comments aying you should screw them both - an excellent reminder why relationship/women questions and comments should be banned here

[shihoodiacarf]

How long have you been with your current GF? How would you feel if she wanted to meet other people too (be honest about that)?

As the others have said, the grass is always greener and seems ever greener after 5, 10, 15 years with the same partner. You need to decide what kind of person you're going to be in your relationships.

[ppfpooghn]

I'm going to presume that this is serious for now....

"So I guess the question is, does that make me a creep and is it cheating?"

Yes, it does and yes it is.


More to the point, what were you doing on match.com when you're in a relationship?

The grass is always greener until you lie on in. Nothing wrong with window shopping, just don't try anything on.

Still on Match just because my account has not expired. We have been dating for a couple months now. Maybe its like you said the grass is always greener. Well, thanks for the sound advice. I will just drop it then I am happy but I always have this bug saying could someone make you more happy. I think it is just hitting me hard since it has been so long since I have been a relationship.

[Zpxbawtz]

Do not go near any women at all as you are obviously not ready for commitment. Most girls want commitment. You're the cause of a broken heart waiting to happen.

[wmzeto]

BOOM. Lazer lays it down....

But he is right.

[Sheelldaw]

Do not go near any women at all as you are obviously not ready for commitment. Most girls want commitment. You're the cause of a broken heart waiting to happen.

I am not the kind of guy to string a girl along, I can't really say you are completely wrong but I feel like maybe I just need to get my head on straight? Anyone in a long term relationship currently or in the past experience anything similar?

I feel creepy even thinking about doing it yet there are dudes all over that cheat on their GF or whatever. I not even talking about sexual contact and I fell bad thinking it. Damn my conscience has returned as a result of lowering my medication I fear.

[dubballey]

I am not the kind of guy to string a girl along, I can't really say you are completely wrong but I feel like maybe I just need to get my head on straight? Anyone in a long term relationship currently or in the past experience anything similar?

7 yr relationship. im now 26. Never felt the way you are....

[Hitfaromarf]

You're the cause of a broken heart waiting to happen.

I thought that was the sight of you in a speedo?

--- Post Update ---

We have been dating for a couple months now.

That changes it a bit...there is a three month hump in relationships. I.E at that point you are either ready to break up or get serious.

Sounds like you're ready to break up.

[MaugleeRobins]

7 yr relationship. im now 26. Never felt the way you are....

Wow, that is awesome man. Go you, you are still a just a kid. I am just a freak show, not feeling better yet...

[nerohedfrs]

7 yr relationship. im now 26. Never felt the way you are....

Well it's different when it's your mum.

[Jadldqys]

Well it's different when it's your mum.

LOL!!!

[Drugmachine]

Are you dating or are you together? Unless there has been a 'talk', then technically you might be in the clear. I say might, because girls have different views on the subject. The way I see it, there is nothing wrong with wanting to browse the female buffet, especially since, as you imply... have been eating ramen for so long. Best to talk to her first, though, or you only have yourself to blame for the boiling bunny you might one day find on your stove.

That you are questioning your situation seems normal to me. Nothing wrong with wondering if you think she is great because she is the first girl you have had relations with in a while, and if you can do better. That is what they are thinking every second they are with you, can they do better than you? No shame feeling the same.

Word of advice: If you have raw dogged her, she thinks you are more than 'dating', regardless of what you think.

As Dawkins would say, There is no such thing as excess for the male psyche.

[gtyruzzel]

Chatting up chicks on dating sites is cheating. In fact, it's a precursor to the WORST form of cheating. Emotional cheating.

I was with the same girl for 8 years. I was cheated on a few times. By far the worst is when your wife is playing housewife to another man. The worst thing you can do to your partner isn't to sleep with someone else...emotional cheating is the real killer. I'm not divorced because other dudes shagged her, I'm divorced because she played wife to another man.

Clearly you're not ready for a serious relationship. If you find yourself doing more than just browsing what's out there then you need to break it off or make sure she knows it's just casual fun and nothing serious.

If she's the one then she's the one. Not once during my marriage, or even the relationship from the beginning for that matter, did I ever once consider dating another girl. I wasn't the least interested in playing the field. I'm not saying don't question your feelings, but if you go so far as to be seriously considering talking to other women then she's not the one. If she was you wouldn't even consider actively pursuing another woman to the point where you browse a dating site.


I'm assuming that since you defined it as serious she's under the impression that it's exclusive, you hang out often, and you're both under the expectation that it will escalate rather than just be a string of casual dates.

[Clielldub]

Well it's different when it's my mum.

No doubt... she's a stunning woman...

and good one btw...

[SimSlim]

No doubt... she's a stunning woman...

and good one btw...

I got crucified on the mum jokes at work today. My colleague got five in a row, quick fire style as I said things. I love mum jokes.

[Deengealf]

Mum jokes in every conversation in our office. Highly articulate bunch. Cant beat 'em.

[dr-eavealer]

Mum jokes in every conversation in our office. Highly articulate bunch. Cant beat 'em.

You need to be quick to be good at mum jokes. I'm usually on the ball but I had a hangover.