[DJElizardo]

I finally got to my snapping point yesterday and I am going to take a break, to try to restore what little sanity I have left for this game. The swing demons and everything that comes with them, finally won and I am frustrated to no end. I was a consistent low 80's shooter just a few years ago, and I cared NOTHING for the game then, like I do now. I played more often, but I didn't LIVE the game like I do now. I didn't spend the money then, that I do now. I didn't do the research then, that I do now. I just played the game. I am a perfectionist, and I grind myself pretty hard, and when I know I am capable of doing something much better, and have before, I get down on myself and don't enjoy myself when I should be. I came to the conclusion yesterday, after a 27 holes of bad golf, that I needed to take a break for a couple weeks. I know I am so much better than the 104 I shot yesterday. I have been there.

The roller coaster has worn me out. One good week of golf (what I consider to be good golf) followed by two or three bad rounds, filled with all kinds of new and old swing gremlins. I am tired of it. Early in the year, I was battling shanks with everything from the 8i to the SW. I have cured the shanks, and now I am dealing with dead pulls with the high irons and wedges. Most of last year, I dealt with a off the map push fade with the driver. Now, this year, half of my tee shots are pull hooks, with the other half keeping me happy enough to keep coming back. I pissed away so many shots yesterday with my short game, just by missing my chipping or pitching target by a yard, or having the speed just a hair wrong on my putts. I honestly felt like the Golf God's were there to punish me for whatever reason and they were making their presences know. I guess I just came to the realization, I am not that good, I am never going to be that good, and those low 80's I used to shoot consistently, were a thing of the past and that I needed to settle in as a duffer with no skill.

It got me down and I did not enjoy myself. And I can't imagine it would be that much fun playing with a person that is grinding themselves so hard, that they can't even enjoy the company of others and the camaraderie of enjoying a round of golf with buddies.

I told Kelly last night, I am at your disposal on your next few days off (meaning on her days off, I was usually playing golf), I am walking away from golf for a couple weeks and if there is something you want to do, we will do it. I do have to give her some kudos, because of simply letting me give up and pout for two weeks, she promised we would go to the range a few times and she would video tape my swing for me, maybe try to spot what it is I am doing through the bag. She knows how much golf means to me, and knows I don't want to give up, but she also hates seeing me play bad golf, because she knows I am capable of playing SO much better.

I am actually looking forward to not playing golf for a couple of weeks and instead, just getting back to the basics, a time when I enjoyed golf and looked at it as a luxury in life, instead of a given.