[ferelrossi]

Asalaamu' Alaykum Dear Ummah

I was watching a video on YouTube about depression and suicide and etc. The video said that if a Muslim is depressed there is something wrong with your Iman. And it also said that a believer can never be depressed. This makes me feel really bad inside I don't want to be depressed but it's not like I have a choice. I live with my source of depression. And the person who helped me over come my depression left forever. So is it true? Is my Iman lower than non-depressed Muslims? I do extra prayers in the night, fast, read Quran, and do Dikhr. I love Allah (SWT) and his Messenger (SAW). This makes me want to cry, now I truly feel worthless.*

P.S. I'm depressed because of my family and how they treat me and also that my Dad and Mom separated and I miss my Dad so much. I plan to move in with him Insh'Allah

[Qahtwugc]

I pray you get better sister. First of all, I hope and pray that the video was wrong otherwise I'm in trouble too. More knowledgeable members will comment on that

Secondly, if there are any specific problems you would like to discuss and seek advice (with regards to your family and any other matters), then feel free to post about it on this forum, there are many good people here who will help

Moving in with your father seems like a good idea, I hope that works out for you

Please keep up the excellent deeds you are performing (salah, reciting Quran, etc). Also try and send blessings upon Rasoolullah as often as possible as that should help you recover from your depression

With regards to feeling worthless, please do not do so... the great Companion of our beloved Messnger , Abu Bakr (RA) said something along the lines of 'even the lowest of the believers is worth something because Allah loves him' (I hope someone can give the precise quote ). So do not sadden and grieve over a youtube video, and aim to continue doing good deeds with sincere intentions and pray that you are given the best of ends (death with imaan). You are being tested, and it seems you are passing so please do not falter sister. Keep to the Straight Path as you are now

I hope others can help you better. I pray we all die as believers and enjoy the bounties of Paradise, where there is no depression and only joy. Ameen

[fkisjjdhh]

السلام عليكم

Faint not, neither sorrow; you shall be the upper ones if you are believers. (3:139)

But the one that was below her called to her, 'Nay, do not sorrow; see, thy Lord has set below thee a rivulet. (19:24)

Lo! those who say: Our Lord is Allah, and afterward are upright, the angels descend upon them, saying: Fear not nor grieve, but hear good tidings of the paradise which ye are promised.(41:30)

We said: Go down, all of you, from hence; but verily there cometh unto you from Me a guidance; and whoso followeth My guidance, there shall no fear come upon them neither shall they grieve. (2:38)

[SpecialOFFER]

Bismillah Ir-Rehman Ir-Raheem

Assalam-Alaikum, my dearest, sweet, precious young sister:

May Allah grant you aafiyat in this life and the hereafter.

My dear Sister, you are not worthless.

Sister, I do not normally share this online or in real life, as Masha-Allah life has moved on and so have I. However, my dear sister, I read your first thread on this Forum and do understand your concerns in this thread. However, I want to tell you first and foremost that I love you for the sake of Allah, and you are not worthless because Allah loves you, I promise you.

When I was your age, during middle school, due to the bullying I was facing in school from the students in my school, I tried to commit suicide and wished to die. I did not succeed the original time. I used to simply feel so unloved, as my parents themselves were busy in their business concerns and financial downfall and unfortunately neglected me during the period I needed them the most. I felt so unloved and unhappy and abandoned. I suffered from severe depression and had to get counseling to become better until Masha-Allah Allah cured me of the depression after a struggle period. So, I empathize with you, my Sister. I understand what you are undergoing, and Insha-Allah, everything will pass just as it passed for me after a time.

My dear sister, I know Allah loves you because I used to think Allah must hate me to make me suffer so; so, as a child, I rejected the divine completely, rejecting religion because I was in so much pain. The truth was that I acted as if I hated everybody (and I did to some degree), but what no one could understand was that I hated myself the most (because I felt something must be wrong with me to render me so unlovable to people in my life such as my family and my peers who were mentally torturing me everyday in school).

Sister, I was not wise as you, and I did not have the resource like you do in this Forum. For most of my life, my Sister, I was like a wanderer. I kept wandering in search of happiness and peace and the last thing I thought was that I would find it in religion, least of all Islam.

Now, when I look back at the depression that I suffered and the struggles I underwent and the peace I had never found, I realize that all those moments were building blocks that Allah had created in His Wisdom and Mercy so that I could return to Him. Dear sister, perhaps you will not understand what I am about to say, but I will say this anyway, because maybe Allah will give you an understanding of what I wish to convey: “Troubles turn you into a treasure.” (Today, I am most grateful to Allah for those hardships, because I understand His wisdom Insha-Allah.)

My sister, you are precious, and one day, you will realize the beauty in these struggles and hardships because they build character. Sister, while we cannot always control what struggles we will undergo, we can control our response to those struggles. And what my great wish for you is that you will choose patience and hope.

Sister, too many things are happening presently in your life and you are bound to experience hormonal changes as well in your teen years as you grow into a beautiful, capable Muslimah Insha-Allah. So, some depression at this stage will be natural. However, to keep your depression from spiraling further, I ask that you please keep your thoughts focused on positives of your life. Sister, unless you transform your thoughts from negative to positive, you will not progress either spiritually or as a person. So, make sure to either make a list of all the things you are currently grateful for in your life and thank Allah for them in your prayers or simply go outside and contemplate the wonders of Allah like insects or other animals and heed lessons from their struggles. Insha-Allah, seeing gratefulness within you despite any problems you presently face will make Allah give you more of that which you would like in your life and take away that from within your life that you dislike.

Sister, anytime you feel overwhelmed, do not hesitate to come to this Forum and share your thoughts. Insha-Allah, brothers and sisters will be happy to give encouragement to their sweet young sister. My sister, you are not worthless. If you were worthless, I would not be here writing to you, as I am writing to you. Worthless is the life of this world, and wasted are the tears on its worthlessness. Instead, your tears, precious tears, save them to cry only to Allah.

Sister, find a hobby like a crafts or art or collection of some sort in which you can find passion, because that will Insha-Allah make you find a place of solace within yourself that you can slowly develop confidence in yourself and find what you like. Also, Sister, find biographies that you can read of inspiring people, whether of figures within Islam or famous and successful people; they will Insha-Allah encourage and inspire you.

Sister, one day, when I was in a market, though at that time I was still lost to Allah, I was still touched when I read this poem on one of the mirror frames, which I want to share with you (because even though a non-Muslim author wrote this, Insha-Allah this encompasses wisdom of knowing that Allah is with us and even closer than we can imagine during our troubles):

Footprints in the Sand

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there was one only.
This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from anguish,
sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints,
so I said to the Lord,
“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life
there has only been one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?”
The Lord replied,
“The years when you have seen only one set of footprints,
my child, is when I carried you.” Sister, finally, realize that whether people of this world befriend you or not, Allah Azwajjal is Insha-Allah a Forever Friend.

If I have said anything that is good and true, it is from Allah, and anything other than that is my own mistake.

[Soadiassy]

Anybody:

Mashallah nice poem. Mashallah that was an inspiring post.

sister Love:

You are going through a trying period in your life. It will pass sooner or later.

My friend once remarked, "Where will all our problems be 10 years from now?" Keep perspective in your life. I think our depression and suicidal feelings come from thinking too narrowly and thinking that our problems will last forever. May Allah help you and me.

[payloansday]

Asalaam 'Alaykum

A lot of good advice has already been given, I just want to add a few more things.
Muslims don't get depressed can be said to be partly true, meaning when somone's depressed they don't like how their life is going etc..but don't forget that whats happening with each one of us is part of taqdeer-fate/destiny and we can't question our own taqdeer.
Rather being in that mind set of 'nothings going right' or 'I'm feeling depressed' or 'I can't do it anymore' focus on the good things. Be thankful for the blessings Allah has given you..even though your problems might be blinding you from seeing them. Find the strength to carry on. Think of the sahabas and our beloved Prophet ..when things got hard for them they grew stronger. It'll be hard but its nothing you can't get thorugh, as it says in the last ayat of surah Buqarah 'Allah burdens not a person beyond his capacity'. So mentally find the strength to tell yourself that inshallah with Allahs help everything will be ok. Then work on your problems/emotions one by one.
We can't control every aspect of our life and so naturally we will be be upset when things don't go the way we think they should. Continue making your Imaan stronger, continue making dua and never lose hope in the mercy of Allah. Life's going to be hard..but we just have to be patient
Inshallah you'll be in my duas.