[eduptultyt]

...

[Suentiend]

And the woman is getting the blame for having a secret affair..

[Tapupah]

Sick social pressure defeats manhood; the burden of this crisis mostly left on women's shoulders.

[Irravepem]

nowadays we've got 'intelligent' people, but none of them is 'mature'.

[Suentiend]

The more I look at Shariah, the more I see that all Ahkaam are about man-being-a-man!

TRUE...

VERY VERY TRUE..

[Jerwittdergut]

A good lecture on Healthy Marriage. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSEsUZIT6d8

Initially He talks about how to deal with Non-Muslims who accuses Islam for Polygamy and slavery. In the "8th minute" he starts talking about Marriage. Especially the Modern perspective.

Edit: Advice for sisters from 19th minute onwards.

[Tapupah]

^^ It is not in Urdu, is it?

[Jerwittdergut]

^^ It is not in Urdu, is it?

No, Its in English bro.

[Suentiend]

Dr sahib,



Can you please post a summary here?

Sorry for the doctor thing, was a joke

[Jerwittdergut]

Dr sahib,



Can you please post a summary here?

Sorry for the doctor thing, was a joke

Oh no Don't apologize. No offense taken Maulana, I m sometimes too emotional. lol.

Yea I shall post the summary in a few minutes.

A good lecture on Healthy Marriage. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSEsUZIT6d8

Initially He talks about how to deal with Non-Muslims who accuses Islam for Polygamy and slavery. In the "8th minute" he starts talking about Marriage. Especially the Modern perspective.

Edit: Advice for sisters from 19th minute onwards.

[Suentiend]

Oh no Don't apologize. No offense taken Maulana, I m sometimes too emotional. lol.

Yea I shall post the summary in a few minutes.

Please make it short and simple and in points, It's very easy to read that way. Personally I don't read long posts, don't know about others.

You shouldn't get emotional you know, We mullas are called so many things. Never get emotional

You've seen me getting emotional on anything other than ta'addud?

[Tapupah]

I second the request. Summary would be useful. I realized I can't memorize 3 pages in an hour, so decided to avoid pictures of animates and videos as far as I can.

[Suentiend]

I also take Mufti Ebrahim Desai's (DB) fatwa in this.

[Jerwittdergut]

You shouldn't get emotional you know, We mullas are called so many things. Never get emotional

Yea i know, I will try to loose it.

[CAxrrAYN]

Great video - beside marriage questions - so simply clarifies all the most difficult parts of quran
w alikum assalam

[Jerwittdergut]

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Certainly will the believers have succeeded: (1)
They who are during their prayer humbly submissive (2)
And they who turn away from ill speech (3)
And they who are observant of zakah (4)
And they who guard their private parts (5)
Except from their wives or those their right hands possess, for indeed, they will not be blamed - (6)
[Suratul Mu'minun]
( I don't think i can do justice to summarize the video,i am not good at words, anyways here you go)

- First thing is to loose the attitude 'I know its mentioned in the Quran, but its not applicable to my situation'. Quran is the best solution.

- In this Modern age, most of the Men before marriage think once they get marriage everything will be ok. They do not think about the responsibilities. Initially He will be more tolerating, but with the passing of years even small things become cause for arguments.

-Quran describes Marriage as Husband taking in wife under his fort (protection), not just to satisfy his needs.

-A technique to deal with marriage problems is both the Husband and wife has to forget about the rights for the time being and start fulfilling their own duties. This way ones expectations will be lowered and will be satisfied with each other. As long as one put hopes in Creation, one will be disappointed. Only Allah can satisfy us.

-The Husband should should go out of habit and try to please the wife. One Once a Sahabah came to Umar (ra) and said he wants to divorce his wife because he is not interested in her anymore. Umar (ra) asked him , what about courtesy you owe your wife.

-Husbands should appreciate that their wives put up with them and their actions.

-Women should understand the weakness of Men. Its Women. Its the way Men are created.

-If the wives can understand this weakness, instead of condemning him, she should try to ward off this temptation and support the husband.

-A smile from the Wife when the Husband comes home. Its very important. Its a small gesture with profound positive effect. These are simple but powerful solutions.

-Both of them should take care of each other. They should remember more about their duties than rights.

-Also Arguments should be reduced. Men think everything can be solved by logical reasoning. But Women are complicated. The best way to make a point with ones wife is by following the Sunnah or our Beloved Rasoolullah : 1. Mercy 2. Silence .


P.s. He talks about the 'What the Right hand possess' from 27th min onwards. I haven't summarized it. SubhanAllah he has given a beautiful explanation about it.

Video: A good lecture on Healthy Marriage. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSEsUZIT6d8

[Suentiend]

Great points.

Thanks for summarizing. See how easy it was to read

[KRbGA0Bg]

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Certainly will the believers have succeeded: (1)
They who are during their prayer humbly submissive (2)
And they who turn away from ill speech (3)
And they who are observant of zakah (4)
And they who guard their private parts (5)
Except from their wives or those their right hands possess, for indeed, they will not be blamed - (6)
[Suratul Mu'minun]

( I don't think i can do justice to summarize the video,i am not good at words, anyways here you go)

- First thing is to loose the attitude 'I know its mentioned in the Quran, but its not applicable to my situation'. Quran is the best solution.

- In this Modern age, most of the Men before marriage think once they get marriage everything will be ok. They do not think about the responsibilities. Initially He will be more tolerating, but with the passing of years even small things become cause for arguments.

-Quran describes Marriage as Husband taking in wife under his fort (protection), not just to satisfy his needs.

-A technique to deal with marriage problems is both the Husband and wife has to forget about the rights for the time being and start fulfilling their own duties. This way ones expectations will be lowered and will be satisfied with each other. As long as one put hopes in Creation, one will be disappointed. Only Allah can satisfy us.

-The Husband should should go out of habit and try to please the wife. One Once a Sahabah came to Umar (ra) and said he wants to divorce his wife because he is not interested in her anymore. Umar (ra) asked him , what about courtesy you owe your wife.

-Husbands should appreciate that their wives put up with them and their actions.

-Women should understand the weakness of Men. Its Women. Its the way Men are created.

-If the wives can understand this weakness, instead of condemning him, she should try to ward off this temptation and support the husband.

-A smile from the Wife when the Husband comes home. Its very important. Its a small gesture with profound positive effect. These are simple but powerful solutions.

-Both of them should take care of each other. They should remember more about their duties than rights.

-Also Arguments should be reduced. Men think everything can be solved by logical reasoning. But Women are complicated. The best way to make a point with ones wife is by following the Sunnah or our Beloved Rasoolullah : 1. Mercy 2. Silence .


P.s. He talks about the 'What the Right hand possess' from 27th min onwards. I haven't summarized it. SubhanAllah he has given a beautiful explanation about it.

Video: A good lecture on Healthy Marriage. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSEsUZIT6d8
Beautiful advices. for that extra effort.
Maulana's hikmat of summarizing the speech is great, as sometimes people do not have time to go thru the whole bayan.

[Enrivaanonock]

...Also Arguments should be reduced. Men think everything can be solved by logical reasoning. But Women are complicated. The best way to make a point with ones wife is by following the Sunnah or our Beloved Rasoolullah : 1. Mercy 2. Silence .


...

Although all of the advice provided is beneficial without doubt, this piece that I have quoted above is probably the one that we are in need of the most these days.

[Grennios]

The more I look at Shariah, the more I see that all Ahkaam are about man-being-a-man!

The more I look at Shariah, the more I see that all Ahkaam are about man-being-a-man!

Assalamu Alaikum, very true with a few exceptions

When men will start being Men (RIJAAL), then the women will learn to depend on them and trust them and rely on them and their decisions.

Since Men are not being Men then someone has to take that position, so women are becoming the Ameers at home and it is also reflecting in the society, look at all the female Head of the Countries.

May Allah help us to become what He expects us to be, ameen.