[truportodfa]

What can local ulema and the community do to remove the bariers that stop early or young marriage from occuring.

specifically the religious sphere

[geraint.faughn]

What can local ulema and the community do to remove the bariers that stop early or young marriage from occuring.

specifically the religious sphere

Not much unfortunately. The sad fact is that they have very little authority in the sphere of social interactions that exist in communities. Their advice on issues such as how to perform the nikah (ie the legal contract) is about all people are willing to accept.

People generally want to get their children stable financially before they even consider marriage. This means University and then finding work for more and more people now as our community "progresses".

This is equally prevalent in the religious circles from what I've seen.

Even young practising brothers and sisters find it difficult to marry as they want to do it simple and cheap but due to "culture" and what society dictates, they have to try and please parents and pay for stupid rituals which are just for show. This can be a major put off for someone thinking that his savings are going to go up in smoke in one day!

I don't think that it's Ulema who can change this trend, but young practising brothers and sisters who are strong enough to say no to these expensive rituals and set an example and make it easier for the weaker brothers/sisters. (weaker - not meant in derogatory terms)

[StitsVobsaith]

People need to follow the Qurʾān and the Sunnah on an individual basis, whether their relatives and society will accept them or reject them for that doesn't matter. The scholars can remind the people of their duties and rights in Islām, but at the end it is up to every individual to either follow the Dīn or follow the desires.

The key to getting married and to all other problems is to make duʿā to Allāh first, then take the appropriate means (however insignificant they appear) and then you keep making duʿā to Allāh and inshāʾ Allāh you will be successful.

The above is what a local revert brother did (he's 21 years old, has been Muslim for less than a year), now he's got a wife, his own house, etc.. I have seen this with my own eyes.

The solution is turning to Allāh!

والله اعلم۔

[goctorsurger]

What can local ulema and the community do to remove the bariers that stop early or young marriage from occuring.

specifically the religious sphere

We should do our best effort to protect youth from sin but are they ready for marriage? Would you say that the average 18 year old Muslim boy/girl is ready for responsibilities of marriage? Or would throwing them into marriage force them to feel the weight of responsibility and stand up to it? I really dont know. Fine we marry them off and take care of one of their problems, then what happens the following morning? I dont know what outweighs what and how the fuqaha make that distinction, I cant comment on that. It could solve many problems or be the cause of collapse of family structure.

1400 years ago, an 18 year old man back then was able to command an entire army whereas an 18 year old man in this age can barely do his own laundry/manage his finances. A 16 year old, simply back in my grandparents age, a 16 year old girl could run an entire household. 16 year old girls now are still busy with Barbie and Brittney Spears. It does solve a major problem and could be means to save many people from sin. I just dont know how well it could be sustained.

Personally I think each case should be handled individually.

[TheDoctor]

Kids are eager to marry and quick to devorce. Ulemas are stuck between rock and hardplace and we want them to provide solution when most of us do not even know what married life suppose to entail. Along with spiritual exercies the following should be given as priority
1. stop eating junk food 2. stop watching rubbish 3. get every youngstars (girls and guys) in doing activities that keeps them busy 4. Parents should put pressure on kids studies and only allow them out at certain time in an organised manner.
Allahualam

Good advice for everybody, not just kids

[HondasMenFox]

We should do our best effort to protect youth from sin but are they ready for marriage?

Yes. If they are ready for driving Daddy's car and voting, then they are ready for marriage.

Would you say that the average 18 year old Muslim boy/girl is ready for responsibilities of marriage?

If rightly brought up, why not?

Or would throwing them into marriage force them to feel the weight of responsibility and stand up to it?

Inshallah, it would.

I really dont know. Fine we marry them off and take care of one of their problems, then what happens the following morning?

Breakfast.

I dont know what outweighs what and how the fuqaha make that distinction, I cant comment on that. It could solve many problems or be the cause of collapse of family structure.

We don't need to think so much about following the way of the Salaf. It is abandoning their way that has brought us to where we are.

1400 years ago, an 18 year old man back then was able to command an entire army whereas an 18 year old man in this age can barely do his own laundry/manage his finances.

We need to ask why and then correct it. Although this is not a universal phenomenon. I know people who have been working 14 hours a day since the age of 10. So why can't they marry at 20? Parents need to be little more proactive.

A 16 year old, simply back in my grandparents age, a 16 year old girl could run an entire household.

She won't have to run an entire household now. Just manage herself and her husband.

16 year old girls now are still busy with Barbie and Brittney Spears.

Who gave the Barbie and Britney to the girl?

It does solve a major problem and could be means to save many people from sin. I just dont know how well it could be sustained.

The Sunna is perennially sustainable, the Umma need not worry how.

Personally I think each case should be handled individually.

Sounds like Malaria.

[HondasMenFox]

People need to follow the Qurʾān and the Sunnah on an individual basis, whether their relatives and society will accept them or reject them for that doesn't matter. The scholars can remind the people of their duties and rights in Islām, but at the end it is up to every individual to either follow the Dīn or follow the desires.

The key to getting married and to all other problems is to make duʿā to Allāh first, then take the appropriate means (however insignificant they appear) and then you keep making duʿā to Allāh and inshāʾ Allāh you will be successful.

The above is what a local revert brother did (he's 21 years old, has been Muslim for less than a year), now he's got a wife, his own house, etc.. I have seen this with my own eyes.

The solution is turning to Allāh!

والله اعلم۔

[HondasMenFox]

How could one afford to get a house after 1 year of marriage.

uh huh...is everyone born poor?

There are no govrnment housing anymore and rent is expensive.

So?

Unless one has no problem taking an interest based loan.

Husn Dhann, Husn Dhann.

Irony.

Truly ironical.....your post that is and your ilm al ghayb.

Eager to follow a sunnah by fighting agaisnt Allah and His Rasul

Eager to advise by eating the flesh of our brothers? WS

[goctorsurger]

We should do our best effort to protect youth from sin but are they ready for marriage?

Yes. If they are ready for driving Daddy's car and voting, then they are ready for marriage.

Would you say that the average 18 year old Muslim boy/girl is ready for responsibilities of marriage?

If rightly brought up, why not?

Or would throwing them into marriage force them to feel the weight of responsibility and stand up to it?

Inshallah, it would.

I really dont know. Fine we marry them off and take care of one of their problems, then what happens the following morning?

Breakfast.

I dont know what outweighs what and how the fuqaha make that distinction, I cant comment on that. It could solve many problems or be the cause of collapse of family structure.

We don't need to think so much about following the way of the Salaf. It is abandoning their way that has brought us to where we are.

1400 years ago, an 18 year old man back then was able to command an entire army whereas an 18 year old man in this age can barely do his own laundry/manage his finances.

We need to ask why and then correct it. Although this is not a universal phenomenon. I know people who have been working 14 hours a day since the age of 10. So why can't they marry at 20? Parents need to be little more proactive.

A 16 year old, simply back in my grandparents age, a 16 year old girl could run an entire household.

She won't have to run an entire household now. Just manage herself and her husband.

16 year old girls now are still busy with Barbie and Brittney Spears.

Who gave the Barbie and Britney to the girl?

It does solve a major problem and could be means to save many people from sin. I just dont know how well it could be sustained.

The Sunna is perennially sustainable, the Umma need not worry how.

Personally I think each case should be handled individually.

Sounds like Malaria.

Doc sahab, maybe we live in different worlds, give it a shot. If it works I will be advocate of it here.

[HondasMenFox]

Doc sahab, maybe we live in different worlds, give it a shot. If it works I will be advocate of it here.

Have decided to do it with my kids, inshallah. Will marry my sons off at 21 because that is the legal age limit here in India. Kabhi kabhi kadak hona padta hai. By the way, one is 2.5 yrs old and the other is 7 months. Just 20 yrs to go.

[goctorsurger]

Have decided to do it with my kids, inshallah. Will marry my sons off at 21 because that is the legal age limit here in India. Kabhi kabhi kadak hona padta hai. By the way, one is 2.5 yrs old and the other is 7 months. Just 20 yrs to go.

India?

[HondasMenFox]

India?

India...al Hind....Hindostan...why?

[goctorsurger]

India...al Hind....Hindostan...why?

Where in India are you from? You ever been to USA?

[HondasMenFox]

Where in India are you from? You ever been to USA?

Bombay. Never been to the US. I will never get a visa...for various reasons.

[goctorsurger]

Bombay. Never been to the US. I will never get a visa...for various reasons.

You are an alim?

[HondasMenFox]

You are an alim?

I am a doctor...a Physician to be precise.

[goctorsurger]

Not every American Muslimah are fasiq in a similar way not all indian muslimah are saleh. My wife is from UK and in comparision to many of the desi is a Jewel. Ofcouse she has her British cultural handover but is a straightforward not manipulative, genunie person mashallah. Go to your local darul ulm and ask the imams if they knew anyone suitable.
I for one oppose to the notion going over to parents country of origin to marry at first instance. Know this muslim men on the day of judgement will be held responsible for looking after the community of their country of residents. Irnonic, people talk of fitnah when our own self contribute to the dissfuntional nature of the society we live in.
allahualam

Nomadic,

Excellent point, Masha'Allah.

[HondasMenFox]

Not every American Muslimah are fasiq in a similar way not all indian muslimah are saleh. My wife is from UK and in comparision to many of the desi is a Jewel. Ofcouse she has her British cultural handover but is a straightforward not manipulative, genunie person mashallah. Go to your local darul ulm and ask the imams if they knew anyone suitable.
I for one oppose to the notion going over to parents country of origin to marry at first instance. Know this muslim men on the day of judgement will be held responsible for looking after the community of their country of residents. Irnonic, people talk of fitnah when our own self contribute to the dissfuntional nature of the society we live in.
allahualam

Who claims that Muslimas from a particular region are fasiq?

[juptVatoSoito]

This thread need not get out of hand. I think that things are different in different parts of the world and so we should make that clear. Non-Western answers may not be a solution to Western problems as there is a difference in state structure, opportunities and way of life. Now this isn't to say that some follow the Sunnah and some don't, but there are situational circumstances that may mean that you approach things differently.

[juptVatoSoito]

This thread need not get out of hand. I think that things are different in different parts of the world and so we should make that clear. Non-Western answers may not be a solution to Western problems as there is a difference in state structure, opportunities and way of life. Now this isn't to say that some follow the Sunnah and some don't, but there are situational circumstances that may mean that you approach things differently.