[Progniusis]

Today, was just....one of those days. Peyton is a 9 month old apbt mix, who we do not crate (for those of you who don't know why, its just...a long list of issues and to keep it short, its to save his sanity and mine) and we leave loose around the house while we are out of the house. My boyfriend has started his internship, and works fairly long hours but I only work 5 hours Mon-Fri. Peyton is home alone from 10am till 3pm everyday except weekends usually. Sometimes he's home alone in the evenings, while we go run errands or dinner etc.

Today, I come home to find yesterday's mail that was left on the kitchen table, on the floor...in the living room, SHRED to pieces. Peyton also has had a recent obsession with shoes and has eaten the laces out of a few pair of sperrys and ate the heel out of my boyfriend's running shoes. Not sure if it's bc those types of shoes get rather sweaty/stinky, but who knows.

I decide to take Peyton for a walk at our local people park, for a change of scenery. He was RIDICULOUS. I've had an easier time controlling hot blooded, wild Thoroughbreds straight off the racetrack than I did with Peyton today. Running and yanking and dragging me and when he would get a correctipon, he'd rear up like a horse and shake his body and ugh OMG. I was just...ready to let him go, and run away. I was so angry.

I just felt like sitting down and crying. I was so frustrated. and I know its all my fault, it really is. The weather has been shitty and cold and he hasn't been getting nearly enough exercise, and I know this is why he's releasing his energy outlets elsewhere, and nearly uncontrollable on walks. I also haven't had any extra money to put him into another OB class which he really needs to be in. I feel like I'm somewhat stuck with training him new things because...I don't know how to teach him anything else that I want to do with him. I just want to bang my head against a wall, I feel terrible.

I'm going to really try to motivate myself to walk him longer everyday, and maybe twice a day if I can REALLY motivate myself to get up in the mornings and help him release some more energy before we go to work. I'm also going to try and make sure he has a Kong every single day before we leave for work, and maybe one of those toys that dispenses kibble as he plays with it.

Anyone else feel like this sometimes? It's just...disheartening when you feel like you've gone backwards in training and its all your fault. *sigh* I'm a big crybaby I know but, sometimes I just can't help it. Poor puppy...I got so frustrated with him on our walk, and I feel so bad that I did. He's currently passed out on the couch.

The bad dog, and his masterpiece of the day.