[Rinkeliacasse]

I am interested in all of your opinion on this as you all seem fairly level headed. I have had Rico for about a month, he has come leaps and bounds with his confidence and training. We are using positive methods(Clicker Training) and NILIF with him. He loves training and is starting to hold his head up and listen in new/frightening situations.

Here is my issue. I haven't spoken to my wife's father in 6 months due to him acting extremely degrading toward me and forcing his opinions on us. I finally gave in and agreed to have dinner with them this past weekend and they asked us to bring Rico with us.

We were eating dinner and I warned them that Rico still begs and that I am working on it with him. I thought everything was going fine until Rico walked over to my wifes Dad. He screamed at Rico and kicked him in the face. When I got angry, he told me "That is how I trained all of my dogs and they listened to me, apparently you don't know how to train your dogs".

I responded that due to Rico's past we were doing more harm then good with negative methods and that if he came near me or my dog again he would no longer have any teeth in his mouth.

My question to all of you is, how can I handle this. The wife wants him to have another chance. But I don't think he can contain himself. Am I wrong to not want to have anything to do with this a-hole? I just think that some outside opinions will help.

[endulundaSauh]

Man...I'd have a tough time being civil with someone who kicked my dog in the face...

That's just me...

[gennnniiikk]

I'd probably have the same reaction as you. But, he is family.

Maybe try talking to your FIL calmly and try explaining it to him better. If he still wont go by your rules with the dog, then put Rico in another room, away from your FIL when he comes over. That way he wont feel the need to correct your dog for anything, and it wont set Rico or you back on training. And if they ask you to bring Rico over again, politely refuse.

[Rinkeliacasse]

Man...I'd have a tough time being civil with someone who kicked my dog in the face...

That's just me...

That is how I feel. I fight MMA though, so I have to be very careful to keep my temper in check, as in my state my training makes me much more liable in mutual assault situation.

[timgreyuvcz]

Don't allow him around your dog, and slowly with caution back into your life. He is your wife's dad but that doesn't mean you have to deal with him, just her.

[BEyng6hj]

I would NOT give him another chance. He did it once he'll do it again and it's not fair to your dog to give him another chance. He doesn't deserve it especially since he did it deliberately. Can you crate your dog when he comes over? He'll be safer that way.

Does he live with you or was he just over for dinner? God people like this infuriate me family or not.

[Jadykeery]

I'm a firm believer that when you marry someone, that does NOT mean you marry their whole family. If it were me, I'd be perfectly happy never seeing the guy again. Your wife, of course, can see them all she wants, but that doesn't mean YOU have to.

[gennnniiikk]

I think they were actually at the FIL's house when this happened.

[Rinkeliacasse]

It was just a dinner thing, I think that I he won't get a second chance with Rico. What is most frustrating is that this is like the 5-6th chance I have given him, not with dogs, just with him being an idiot in general. For some reason his wife and daughter(My wife) just put up with it, but I can't.

---------- Post added at 03:01 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:01 PM ----------

I think they were actually at the FIL's house when this happened.

Correct


Also thanks for all the quick replys.

---------- Post added at 03:02 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:01 PM ----------

I'm a firm believer that when you marry someone, that does NOT mean you marry their whole family. If it were me, I'd be perfectly happy never seeing the guy again. Your wife, of course, can see them all she wants, but that doesn't mean YOU have to.

This is the way I am leaning. The wife seems ok with it, she wants us to get along but it will become physical soon if we don't fix it. My fix is to stay away.

[aideriimibion]

Yep... If you put your hands on my dog I'll put my hands on you... I wouldn't have him back over.

[attishina]

well if the piece of shit isnt in the hospital or at the morgue than you are obviously a lot better of a person than i am because if i ever see anybody kick one of my dogs especially my fiancés dad i wouldnt be able to be held responsible for my actions

to me thats the same as spanking somebody elses kids unless your given permission to you just dont do it

[Flieteewell]

Just chiming in late to say I agree w/ you. I wouldn't try it again. It's obvious your FIL has no respect for you & what you are trying to do w/ your dog. I'd keep Rico far away from your FIL.

[BEyng6hj]

Oh okay sorry I must have missed that part. If he is going to be like this with Rico do not allow him to be around him. In fact I wouldn't want to see him again FIL or not.

I wouldn't be able to control myself either, you did good on that but I would NOT give him a second chance.

[spounnypneups]

If one of my family member kicked my dog in the face I would have asked him to leave my home.

I think the best way to handle this is not to have your father-in-law over your house, or in Rico's presence.

When he questions why, be honest and explain that you will not tolerate his way of behavior in your home.

[Aeaefee]

Yep... If you put your hands on my dog I'll put my hands on you... I wouldn't have him back over.

Ditto. I may not be able to throw a punch but I have access to a tazer and I'd give one warning before they got tazed...they asked for him to come over, they were warned that he still begs.

[freediscountplanrrxip]

I am an old man... I have grown married children...
I will not tell them how to raise their kids or their animals...
I had my turn, not it is theirs...
if they ask my opinion, I will give it.. but if they do not ask, it is interference...
your father in law does not respect his wife, or his daughter or you... if he did, he would not act that way...
I would avoid the asshole myself....

[FUNALA]

I'm a firm believer that when you marry someone, that does NOT mean you marry their whole family. If it were me, I'd be perfectly happy never seeing the guy again. Your wife, of course, can see them all she wants, but that doesn't mean YOU have to.

I agree. There is no way I'd let anyone, I don't care who it is, near my dog if they kicked the dog in the face, or for that matter, showed any type of abuse.

[MaickiP]

Ummm... if it were me, he's never see me again. Your wife can go visit, but that man would not be allowed at my house if he kicked my dog in the face. Sorry, they are like my family members, and that just wouldn't be ok with me, ever.

[Rinkeliacasse]

The general consensus here seems to agree with how I was leaning. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't being unreasonable.

[gWhya5ct]

wow, what a a-hole. If i were you, i would have immediately told him to leave. This is the dogs home too, if you don't like it, don't even come inside. No second chances, if he cant respect the inhabitants of the house, he can go shove it.