[maniaringsq]

As most know Serenity has fear issues. She will bite people sometimes if given the chance, she is fearful of so many things it isn't funny. She is only truly comfortable at home or sometimes on walks, depending were we are.

She gets good with training at times and then seems to go back. She has made contact with a person and I haven't said that here before, my worse fear is I'll slip up again and she'll do it again. I just don't %100 trust myself with her.

I love her so dearly, I am crying while writing this. She is everything I had ever wanted in a dog except for the FA. I had always wanted a dog like her and I HATE that my 'perfect' dog has one major issue. I even like her more then Sunny in a lot of ways. I love so much about her. She is so mellow, sweet, funny, cuddly, smart, my dream come true dog.

But I don't trust myself with her and part of me thinks, is it fair to keep her around then?. She's so scared of life/people and at this point in my life, I don't know if I can handle her.

It's tearing me apart saying this but I've spoken with mum and the consideration would be to put her to sleep... God that hurts so much to say. When I'm with her in person, it's hard to think of taking her away to a place that will kill her.

I have already spoken to two people about this..

I don't know exactly why I'm posting this, to get peoples views maybe.

I feel selfish because my beliefs towards dogs. I believe she deserves to live but I'm worried I'll make another mistake. I also don't want a dog like her at the moment, if it was another time, then yes but I want a dog I can take out and do things with and trust. I don't even trust her around my family in fear she may bite them.

I have so much damn guilt for re-homing Guage, my very first dog, a SBT. I have never forgiven myself. I probably never will. I only feel a bit better about putting her down because I know some one else can't hurt her. I just hate I will have to look back and see two dogs I've failed. I wish she turned out more like Sunny.

I have never agreed with people re-homing dogs (my case putting down) because the dog doesn't suit them. Part of me worries I can't handle her.. Part of me wants a dog I can do so much more with. In a few months (if I put her down) I'd get a SBT from a breeder that I can compete with and do things with I want to.

Am I being selfish at all?. I don't fully think I am but still.

Is it wrong I'm choosing not (if I do) to work with her and keep her like this for the rest of her life?.

I just feel horrible because when I look at her, I hate myself for thinking this way. She's my heart and I'm considering this. I feel worse to know I'd be getting another pup in a few months (If I choose to put her down). I'm scared to fail that dog to.

I don't know. I know some people from PBF may have a go at me but I need to hear from other people, be it negative or not.

I feel like I'm betraying my beliefs but I don't know if I can do this for another 14 years.. I don't trust myself that I won't slip up again. I want a dog I can do heaps of things with. She was meant to be that dog and she was so right for it till I found out she wanted to bite people.

Please help me out. I feel so many mixed emotions and thoughts. It's killing me. I don't want her gone but at the same time, I don't know.



I adore her so much.. Looking at her outside, seeing her so happy to see me and wagging her tail.. And to know I'd never see her again. I know I'd love the new pup and get what I wanted but am I doing the right thing?.

If I do this, when is the right time to do it?.

I'm hurting so badly right now..